I refused to show any other signs of fear yet. I had to stay strong while I could. We still weren’t sure of what exactly would happen next.

We called for her and she hesitantly peeked out from the closet door.

“Petra, papa says to pack your things.” Tziporah told her. I assumed she kept the fake names as a warning to her. 

Tziporah packed her things before helping Shira who was crying and shaking. 

I grabbed some clothes and a few of my favorite books. I put on Baba’s necklace she had given me. It was probably now my most prized possession. I wanted it on me so that I knew where it was at all times.

We all carried our bags upstairs. Tziporah and I had calmed Shira down and gotten her to stop crying.  Weh ad told her it would be alright, I prayed we were right.

Mama, Aunt Tovah and Levi stood behind my papa and uncle. It made me feel like papa and uncle were shielding them from the officers. Everyone clutched a bag. David was helping Baba down the stairs. 

“Follow us, please.” The first, and I assumed, leading officer said. 

I noticed all three looked identical from a distance with their pristine uniforms, toned skin and muscular build but I could see eye colors and bits of hair sneaking out of their hats when I was closer.

We all walked without question, either too afraid or too shocked to speak. No one dared to run either, the officers carried guns and we all knew, based on the shootings that they would not hesitate to use them on us.

We did not speak. The only contact we dared with each other was holding hands. My mother, father, Shira and Levi held hands. David and my uncle held onto Aunt Tovah. I had Tziporah and Baba on either side of me. 

My parents led the younger ones with purpose, there was no fear or hesitance in their strides. They showed no signs of fear. This made Shira and Levi slightly less fearful. 

David and my uncle were solid and strong as well. They served as supports for my Aunt Tovah who was shaking violently. I noticed they were slightly dragging her behind them. It impressed me that she wasn’t screaming or sobbing right now.

Tziporah was now trembling a bit more. I squeezed her hand every now and then and she did the same with me.

Baba was the most impressive to me. Her spirit was fierce. Her steps were stronger then ever and determined. There was a fire in her eyes showing her resentment towards the officers. I knew she was not at all afraid of whatever was ahead of us. I admired her and wanted to follow her example.

As for me, I didn’t feel fear in that moment. I was simply observing, I didn’t want to let myself feel yet. I just observed. I tried to remain neutral and unbiased about our situation. I knew that wouldn’t last long though. 

I assumed we walked for forty-five minutes, no one dared to complain or ask questions. It didn’t feel like an option at this point. 

we eventually got to the towns railroad station. A train was there with a lot of storage cars. 

My sense of calmness started quickly vanishing when we heard people in the cars. They screamed, moaned and cried for help. The officers we saw around paid them no mind. 

“Let us out, you Nazi bastards!”

“We need water.”

“There are two more dead in here!” 

“God help us all.”

The strong, rank smell of vomit and human waste made my stomach lurch. It was then that I realized we were going into one of the cars.

Our officers led us to an empty car. It was not terrible large. It had huge wheels and was easily five feet off of the ground. The inside was dark and damp. I hoped it was only damp due to rain storms from earlier in its journey.

“You all are lucky. The camp is maybe a twenty minute train drive away and you get your own car.” An officer told us.

Lucky us? That was a cruel joke. I wanted to spit at this man but I knew that would get my family in trouble. I guess, in a way, we were lucky for not being as cramped as the other cars sounded. 

No one moved, we all stared at the officer, the train or each other in horror. This was our worst fears being realized. 

“Get in the car.” An officer pushed my father towards the car. 

He got in and slowly helped others. He, David and my uncle were the only ones who could get in on their own. The rest of us were either too short or didn’t have enough upper body strength to pull ourselves up.

Apparently it wasn’t fast enough because an officer shoved me roughly.

“Move faster, bitch.” 

David heard this, he had just gotten in but he grabbed my hands and quickly pulled me in to keep me from getting hit. His strength was admirable.

No one had ever called me a bitch before. It felt degrading. It made me despise the officer even more. No officer would talk to me this way if they still believed I was not Jewish. Did my religion really have to change that?

The way he spoke also made me feel like I was an animal or something, not a person.

Was this how Felix acted? I hoped not. I couldn’t imagine him hitting other women and calling them offense names. I had never seen or heard him bee rude to any women.

I was standing between David and Baba. There was enough room for us all to have a small amount of personal space. But when the car door was slammed shut, we all joined hands.

When the train started moving, Aunt Tovah, Shira and Levi started crying. 

The only light we had was from sunlight sneaking through the boards of the car. We could see each other’s outlines. We heard the people talking or crying in the cars near us as well.

Our car was relatively clean but the stench from the other cars was wafting into ours. It made my stomach churn in disgust.

We all started saying prayers of hope. It was all we could do right now. 

To think last night I had considered believing things would get better. This was definitely not any better at all. 

If this was part of God’s plan for us, then last night was cruel. He must have a twisted sense of humor to let us feel a small bit of hope only to smash it with our discovery the morning after.

Some people might consider last night as a blessing. It could’ve been our last chance of any real happiness.

Still, we prayed to god that he would help us stay strong and get through whatever was in store for us.

well, that just happened. im excited to get this out online. i felt pretty good about this one even though its short. what did you think?

vote and comment please?

<3

Tori

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