3rd Anniversary: A New Start

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I swear one of these years I'll have this shit on time, but college is a massive bitch, sooo, yeah, I suddenly don't feel guilty anymore. I thought I would go into how many words I've written for this year or how many followers I got, but I think I want to do something different this time. I want to talk about my achievements, not those I got on some website.

Though I guess any discussion on 2021 naturally has to involve the year that shall not be named. Mainly that with that horrid year, I thought everything would magically get better for us. Look, we all wanted that, okay, but after (insert your own personal event here), I realized something that should've really been obvious.

The world will always be messed up, and it's never magically going to get any better, which left me with a lot of challenges to grapple with. College choices were beating down my neck, I was starting my own podcast, and probably most importantly, I was dealing with massive impostor syndrome. Which wasn't exactly comforting for the future writer.

Especially since, on some level, I think I've always felt this way, that I was still kind of invisible, no matter what site I was on. While this sometimes was a freeing experience, I won't lie and say the anxiety wasn't real. By early spring, I pretty much felt stuck and inadequate amongst years of work. Almost forcing me to question it all.

However, if 2020 could teach me anything in its constant stream of bad news, it was to adapt and overcome, especially when problems come knocking. So instead of being smart, I became stupid enough to try try and try again. And I did things that I didn't think I could do till now.

I burned 25 pounds that I'm still enjoying now out of pure spite. I've written over 100k words in 3 months to create my finest story yet in The Cons. I finally have over 100 followers on Instagram now, and I vastly improved my podcasts with new people. I had my first writing commissions amongst dozens of devilish deals. Most impactful of all, though, I managed to get my high school's English senior award, living proof that my love for the pen to pad wasn't invisible.

While I still don't know if my writing skill is truly up to snuff or ready for the wider world. I'm still going to fight tooth and motherfucking nail till it is! Because I've always had this fire in me, even before I decided to build this platform myself, all I needed was the proper challenge to let it out.

And for everyone reading this, I know there's a fire in you as well, some passion that keeps you going. It doesn't have to be writing or some other concrete career. It's even okay not even to have one. Take it from someone who still has no idea what he's doing. As long as you even want to try, you're already taking the first step.

Whatever bs the world will throw my way next, 2022 will be a special year for my writing. A year of reinvention of all my old work. A year where I expand my writing in new ways and forms. A year that I hope you all manage to stand by me. Because I'm going to keep trying till I make that a reality. 

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