FORBIDDEN ✔️

MY SYSTEM

CHAPTER TWO: MY SYSTEM

" gotta get it out of my system,
gotta get it off of my chest. "
- Louis Tomlinson (out of my system)

Kailan mo ba malalaman na 'di mo na kaya.

"Olivia--"

"No."

Na 'di mo na talaga kayang huminga.

"Olivia, kumalma ka, matagal pa naman deadline ni'ton--"

"I don't care, if you want to do your part next week then that's your decision. Desisyon kong tapusin yung parte ko sa group project, let me do it." malamig kong sagot sa mga groupmates ko.

Na akala mo kaya mo pero 'di mo pala talaga kaya.

"Sige na nga, pero kung kailangan mo ng tulong... nandito naman kami, okay?" ngiting bulong sa'kin ng katabi kong groupmate, nginitian ko na lang siya at pati na rin yung iba.

Kasi feeling ko 'di ko na kaya.

Sasabog na yata ako kakaisip, kakadistract sa sarili ko na alisin siya sa utak ko.

Bawal.

Bawala nga, Liv.

Kaya bakit bumabalik balik ka pa rin sa kanya?

It's been fifteen minutes since all of my classmates left to eat lunch and talk stories, and it's been fifteen minutes since I've realized that it's lunch and I should be eating but I'm almost done here, kaya ko pa naman.

This is a project.

It's kind of a research paper project, it's just to prepare us daw para sa kolehiyo kasi may mga thesis thesis at research papers din na kailangan naming gawin.

We are a group of four, I took the part where I made citations, and wrote our script and what we would talk about in our research paper.

Yes, may script kasi ipepresent din namin 'to sa harap ng teacher namin at English teacher para itsek kong tama ba raw yung grammar namin.

Iba rin kasi ang NEO, they are an international school and they want to make sure that ALL students here have good grades and we all know how to speak and write in English properly.

After this kailan kong isulat yung mga naresearch ko rin.

Alam kong nakakabaliw at nakakawalang gana na gawin ang lahat ng 'to, pero motivated at sobrang inspired ang nanay niyo... bakit?

Ewan ko ba kung bakit.

Siguro kasi hanggang ngayon 'di pa rin nawawala yung lalaking may tattoo sa loob ng medical room sa utak ko.

I still remember every single thing.

Do I look like I want this?

No. Hell no.

'Di ko 'to ginusto. 'Di ko ginustong mahumaling sa isang lalaking tulad ni Brent. 'Di ko ginustong humaling sa kahit sinong tao, in general.

Pero heto ta'yo, isang tingin lang sa lalaking yun tapos napanood ko pa siyang nakikipaghalikan at nakikipagusap sa girlfriend niya.

He also caught me watching them.

That's fucking crazy.

"Hell..."