Surviving The New World (Book Six in the Surviving The Walking Dead Series)

Deployment

"Go away, Negan," I whimpered.

"Michaela, open the door." I ignored Negan and continued to cut away at my locks. Negan knocked on the door once more, but I ignored him, chopping away half the hair on my head. The door suddenly opened and Negan stared at me with disbelief. Tears streamed down my cheeks as I looked at him in the mirror.

"Help me," I sobbed. Negan quickly wrapped me in his arms and held me close as we slid against the wall and onto the bathroom floor. I cried into his chest until my face was numb. Negan took the scissors from me and tossed them to the side, I didn't even fight him. "Oh, God," I cried. "Jesus..."

"It's alright," Negan quietly spoke in a calm voice. "It's alright, I'm here." His hands held me, one gently stroking my choppy hair as one held my arm, gently stroking it with his thumb. "What happened? Bad dream?"

"No, it was real...it was so real."

"You've had bad dreams before—"

"Not like this!"

"Shhh," Negan hushed. "Harper can't see you like this."

"They got me," I whimpered. "I was runnin', I was almost home; someone was holdin' the gate to Alexandria open for me, but the Whisperers grabbed me and cut my face off."

"Sweet—Michaela, it was just a dream."

"No, it's reality!" I quietly snapped. "The Whisperers are comin'! They're comin' and they're gonna kill us all!"

"That's enough, Michaela," Negan argued. "Since when have you ever given up so quickly? You're not gonna give up now, not when the fight hasn't even started." The room fell silent. "You're a goddamn stubborn bitch, you know that? You're stubborn as fuck, and right now, you need that. You're gonna survive these freaks and you're gonna come home to Harper and be the mother she deserves, alright?" I faintly nodded. "Why did you cut your hair?"

"I—I didn't want 'em to get me...I could still feel their hand in my hair." Negan let out a sigh and carefully reached across the floor, picking up the scissors.

"Well...we can't let them have the upper hand now, can we?" Negan released me and carefully cut away at my hair, not stopping until all the strands were gone, leaving me with only an inch or two of hair. We both staggered to our feet and brushed ourselves off before I finally looked myself over in the mirror. Overall, I liked it; at least now they'd have to be on top of me to be able to grab me.

"Well..." I slowly turned to Negan. "How do I look?" Negan slowly ran his fingers through my hair and sighed with a smile.

"You look beautiful."

"Seriously?"

"You could look like a fucking nutsack and I'd still think you're beautiful, baby."

"Negan—"

"I know, no pet names. But right now, I don't give a fuck." Negan took a step closer to me, closing the gap between us. "I love you, Michaela. You know I'm in love with you, but you're not. I've accepted that, but it'll never change how I feel about you. I just—I can't stop loving someone who gave my life purpose again. And I know that I fucked yup that chance to get you back, but I'll forever pay for that mistake if it means keeping you here with me."

"I don't live here."

"I meant in Alexandria."

"Negan—"

"You said someone was holding the gate open for you, in your dream, who was it?"

"Negan—I don't know who it was, I couldn't tell."