To Be Loved | Chris Evans Fan Fic

1

"Hey sweetie, I'm really sorry about the fight. You know how stressed I get before going on a trip" Max smiled sympathetically, oh how badly I wanted to roll my eyes but I knew that would just make matters worse. Instead I put on a big smile and took the blame, letting him walk all over me once again. I don't know why I let it happen, I would tell myself that this would be the last time but it never was. I guess sometimes once he had apologised, I forgot what the argument was even about, I would forget the words he would say to me and all that would be there was love and adoration. When I was away from him I knew what he was doing but if we were together its like a fog was casted over me and my rose coloured goggles were on.

"What you up to tonight then?" he asked me. I felt a pang in my stomach when I remembered I was going out tonight with Mabel and Alex. Max did not like either of them, the same way that neither of them liked Max.

"Quiet night in" I smiled but it didn't quite reach my eyes, thankfully Max didn't notice. The facetime call only lasted another couple of minutes before he had to go to his business meeting meal thing. I let go of a breath I didn't realise I was holding once we had hung up.

My doorbell rung shortly after, I buzzed Mabel and Alex up over the intercom. It didn't take them long to barge in. I was positioned on the bathroom counter doing my makeup in my robe when they found me. Alex had a bottle of tequila in hand, holding it up enthusiastically for me to see. I snatched the bottle from his hand and took a long, long gulp. The golden colour liquid burned my throat as it made its way down.

"Wooo, lets get this party started!" Mabel called out. "Lets find you something to wear" she wagged a finger at me and disappeared off into my room.

Once I was done with my make up, I had gone for a smokey brown liner to extenuate my green eyes with a glossy lip. "You look stunning my dear" Alex complimented.

"Thank you Ali" I pecked him on the cheek then wiped the residue of my gloss of his cheek. Still in my robe, I went to find Mabel who was knee deep in my closet. She battled her way through my clothes and had a little black number on a hanger.

"This would look unreal" she gasped. I nibbled on the inside of my lip. Max would never let me out in that in a million years. Wait he's not even here. I nodded reluctantly, taking the hanger from her and helping her out the closet, I walked back into my bathroom. Slipping the white fluffy robe off, I slipped the satin black dress over my skin. It was a great dress, I looked great in it. I don't know why it made me want to claw my skin off, all I could vision in my head were my flaws. My upper lip was too dark, the freckles dusted across my shoulders and my hair was too frizzy.

"Wow" they gasped as I walked out the bathroom. "You are so gorgeous, look at your figure!" they encouraged. I pang of guilt hit my chest, the two of them would have to do this every time they saw me dressed up like this because of what he would say to me. Over the years the two of them had watched me slip into a pattern of self loathing, I barely picked up that I did it anymore. I was so used to hearing those words, they just became instinct to how I felt towards myself. Turning around and looking in the mirror hanging in my room I smoothed the satin fabric over my hips, fluffing my hair up. I grabbed the first pair of heels I found in my wardrobe and we left to find the uber outside.

Once we finally got to the club and got in, the loud music hummed through me. The tequila began to have an effect and the urge to claw my skin off started to fade. My hips swayed to the beat of the music. Alex shouted in my ear that the first round was on him. I took a hold of Mabel's hands and pulled her onto the dance floor. It was crowded and sweaty but I was having too much fun to care about how close the men were to me.

After a couple of drinks it was safe to say I was pretty buzzed, I made my way off the dancefloor to one of the booths and that's when I saw him. His blue eyes settled on me, making every inch of my body tingle as he scanned over my body. I found myself waving him over which he gladly took. Chris looked good, he had been back in the café again today and stayed for a couple of hours, talking to me while I worked. Once he reached me, he engulfed me in a sweaty bear hug that reeked of alcohol. "Heyy Lily, this is my brother Scott" he slurred, I giggled at how drunk he was and turned to look at Scott who looked so similar to his brother.

"Hi I'm Lily" I held my hand out to him and he shook it.

"Ah I've heard about you missy" he chuckled to himself. Although Chris was rather intoxicated he shot a look at Scott which soon shut him up.

"Lets dance" Chris announced, grabbing my hand before I had a chance to reply. Placing his hand on my hip we began to sway along to the music. His icy blue eyes watched mine. Under his gaze I felt something I hadn't felt in a while. I felt beautiful.