My Silly Adventures With Life

Just A Teenager...

Everyone: You're just a teenager, like, you don't have to worry about anything except school, you don't have problems!

Yea. Just a teenager, who feels that she's unnecessary, useless, a credible little nobody, because of you. 'Cause all the time all I hear is that I'm a lazy bitch, an useless nobody, hysterical little girl, who has no problems, who just craves for attention, who is fat, and who should shut up, because my opinion don't matters at all.

And then you're surprised that I don't want to eat, talk or do anything.

You all always make me feel like I am the one who did everything wrong, I am the one who shouldn't be born, and I am the one who doesn't matters.

But you...You don't notice it. Maybe because I am good at hiding my real feelings...or maybe because you don't care at all.

Sometimes I just stare at the knives or something sharp. Then I catch it and then...just one move, and I'm bleeding of another scar.

Seriously, your words cut deeper than a knife.

And I'm bleeding very hard, I'm on my knees and my body is shaking of crying.

Then I remember other people's good words, something like I look good today, my drawings are beautiful, or anything what is good.

And I stand up again of the floor, I wash my face, look into the mirror and say: "I can do this. I'm strong enough to handle this."

Then suddenly it starts again, and I do these things again.

But yea, I'm just a stupid teenager, who has no problems, except studying and school.

These times I'm glad I know in english.

Understands who understands.