Entanglement

Twelve

You sat opposite Jennie, who was quickly eating up her noodles, you watched in awe as Jennie quickly ate.

You were amazed at how beautiful she could look in the moment even with her hair messy and her face flushed from the steam of the hot bowl.

Your ramen was still too hot for you to eat but you were fine with that, you were enjoying watching Jennie have fun, you liked the way she smiled to herself every time she took in a mouthful. There was nothing better than seeing her happy, her smiles had been rare lately but still they always weakened your knees.

‘What are you looking at?’ Jennie asked furrowing her brows, snapping you out of the lovey monologuing that was happening in your head

‘You shouldn’t eat so fast, you’ll get sick’ You made it too obvious you were staring at Jennie for the wrong reasons, you wanted this lovestruck feeling to stop more than anything.

‘Huh? I’ve never got sick like that before’ Jennie stared at you with confusion, as you looked away blushing ‘you look like you’ve got something on your mind’

‘No I’m fine’ You lied, finally taking a mouthful of noodles ‘its just very warm in here’

‘Do you have chicken in yours?’

‘Yeah’

‘Can I have some?’

‘Mhm’ You took a large chunk of chicken out of your bowl and put it in Jennie’s, smiling as you watched Jennie’s face light up, you just wanted to tell her how beautiful she looked right now, you wanted to tell her how much you loved her and how happy you were to be here with her right now but it wasn’t the right time, it was never the right time. You watched blushing as Jennie chewed on the food delicately

‘Its a little rubbery but its good’

‘I’m happy to see you smile’ You warmly said looking up at Jennie, who had resumed eating her ramen ‘you’ve seemed a little low lately’

‘Have I?’ Jennie laughed in confusion ‘why are you being so affectionate?’

‘You’ve barely been talking to me’

‘Its not like you tried to talk to me either’

‘I just wanted to give you some space after- uh you know’

‘Oh..yeah, I forgot about that’

‘I know you well enough now to know when you’re lying’ You looked up at Jennie’s flushed face, her eyes had a sad look in them along with desperately avoiding any form of eye contact that you tried to make. You extended your hand and put it on top of Jennie’s, holding it gently. This was out of character for you, you never used to like PDA but something about Jennie softened your rules ‘I can tell its bothering you’

‘Its not’ Jennie stated trying to brush it off ‘it meant nothing, I got caught up in the moment and jasmine oil is a natural aphrodisiac’

‘Sure blame it on the oil’ You sighed, shoving a mouthful of noodles in your face ‘whatever helps you sleep at night’

You sat in an awkward silence as you both finished your food, once again the short lived joy you were having dissipated with only a few words and realisations.

You knew you had to be patient, you knew you still needed to earn her trust back but you couldn’t shake the looming cloud of anger you were experiencing, sometimes it felt like you were now the one being lead on. You would have backed off if Jennie made it clear she didn’t want you but the lines were faded and blurry, she returned your kisses and encouraged your advances until they got too far. You wished for things to be clearer, you wished Jennie would tell you exactly what she wanted instead of avoiding the topic.