Of Lace and Lust | Taehyung x Reader

Part 10

Despite going to bed early that night, Monday's 8am alarm hits you mercilessly. You roll over on your pile of pillows, back aching, wanting nothing more than to just go back to sleep. But you have class in an hour, and skipping class is usually something you would never even consider. Especially not when it's from exhaustion, caused by a night of your silly overthinking.

Still, no matter how you try, you can't seem to drag your limbs from the blankets. You hug one pillow in particular in your arms, breathing in the scent. You stole it from Taehyung's room, because he's certainly not using it right now. You just... You wanted something to connect to him. Okay, you finally conclude, I'll... Just call it a sick day. You've fallen back into your dreams before the minute is even up.

It's a clattering that wakes you an hour later. Wiping sleep from your eyes, your first thought is that you're being burgled. Your second is that it's probably Taehyung. He knows you usually have class at this time, so he must be trying to avoid you. Just the thought makes you grit your teeth. This isn't high school again. If he has something to say, then he should just say it to your face. You deserve at least that much.

You take a swig from the cup of water at your bedside and get to your feet. You crack your door open and the rattling intensifies, definitely coming from his room. Perfect opportunity. The haze of sleep is being shoved aside to make way for hurt and annoyance. It's probably a bad idea, but you let the emotions take the reins as you cross the hardwood, let your feet slap noisily on the floor.

"Tae." You hate how weak your voice sounds when what you want is anger. "You're back."

Taehyung turns, and you're startled at how gaunt he looks, as if he has been having sleepless nights of his own. "Just... Just to get a few things." His duffel is already packed and ready to go. He swings it over his shoulder, walks towards you. He expects you to step aside. You don't.

"Please tell me why."

"I-I can't." He tries again, but you stand firmly in place.

"Tae, what is going on?" Your shoulders are folding in on themselves under the impassiveness of his stare. "Why won't you talk to me? I thought... I thought after that night that things were so good between us. Amazing, in fact. But then you left and I don't know what I did wrong but I'm sorry." You take a shuddering breath. "I'm always missing you, Tae. I just want to know why you apparently can't stand me anymore."

"You want to know why?" Taehyung's brows are knit together, furrowed in an irritation you've only seen once or twice before. The way your heart gallops tells you that you're not prepared to hear what he's going to say, despite asking for it just three seconds ago. "Here's why."

The duffel drops to the floor. "Because every time I close my eyes, I picture you beneath me." Taehyung takes a step towards you. "Every time I hear your voice, I think of the way you moaned my name when you came." Another step. His warm hands find your waist. Before you know it, you're pinned against the wall, his breath ghosting across your skin. "And I can't stop wanting to be inside you, to feel you around me, so tight and wet like you were around my fingers."

"Then do it." You swear, you're drenched from the sheer timbre of his low voice.

"See, that's the thing." Taehyung rips away from you, and the air feels too cold without him near. "I can't."

"Why not? I want to, you clearly want to. We know it would be fun. We work well together. It wouldn't be overly complicated. So why the hell not?" Walking towards him, you enter his space once more. When he doesn't answer, you goad him: "Tae? Why not?"

"Because that's not all I want to do!"

Wait. What?

"I want to hold your hand. I want to take you out on dates. I want to always wake up next to you." He's getting visibly frazzled, running his hands through his hair until it's a mess. "I want to be yours. I want to call you mine. Fuck buddies, friends with benefits, shit like that, that's not enough for me." He steps back, as if afraid to be near you. "I'm in love with you, damn it. And that's why I have to leave."