Child Of The Future

Episode 57: Collisions

"You don't think we'd be stronger in numbers?"

"Who gives a sh1t?! All it takes is one!" I lift my index finger. "One person to die! What if it's Rosita?"

"Stop throwing that sh1t in my face, Spes. Listen up here, if you want to go, we'll go, but if you want to stay with them, I wanted you to know, that's an option now." He glares, and I turn away to look at the ground.

"You know what? Fvck options. There are no options. Not anymore. I'm not changing my mind." I frown before scoffing and smiling weakly with heavy eyes that hold discomfort for this little conversation. "I want to go, now. Let's go. It's only about 10 miles right?"

10 miles and we'll be there, hopefully without another person in sight except for Illusion.

Please. Let them be there.

Please.

Be there!

_______________

"It's still on." I frown, resting in the passenger seat with my foot propped up and the soul of my boot pressed against the front, this annoying glow of the walky talky still steady. Fvck, where is he? Close? Far? Why did driving 10 freaking miles not do anything!?

More importantly what do we do now? I can see just by Abraham's look of determined will that he's not going to sit in this car all day, and by the way the sun's rising, he's going to push out of here soon. I don't blame him. I'm anxious. More than ready to get the fvck out of this cheap truck that reminds me of the one Jesse fixed up for us to use the very first day of me being out here...when I first saw the group, when Maggie's sister Beth was being carried out by Daryl, who is, also now dead.

Dammit.

"We have to go." I kick open the door, it's creaking rusty sound pissing me off that I slam it shut when Abraham yanks my shoulder to turn me around from stomping through the forest we parked a ways in so we're not in broad view of anyone that's coming our way.

Searching for us.

Like my dad and Carl.

"What?"

"I don't mind you being a b1tch in your own time but keep it to yourself. I don't want walkers piling towards us on top of everything including your tight as$ issues about your little boyfriend. We got bigger things to think about, so let it go and move on from your sh1t."

"Sure." I pull away, walking like the brat I am without regard for all the leaves I crackle and twigs I snap, but after stomping a bit, hiking through the forest, forgetting all the problems I'm carrying right at this moment, I gasp when a bird suddenly takes off from the ground before me, sh1t, and I stop, mid-step, and feel my shoulders relax, my eyes half closed and the fresh cool air filling up my lungs, expanding them and reviving me, reminding me of some things.

"What's wrong?" Abraham's heavy figure halts beside me.

Wrong?

"Nothing. I was just thinking about home. The mall." My brain backsteps me all the way to those afternoons I would sit at my bedroom window, spying the tall wall built in the distance around us, thinking about what it would be like out here. "I was never allowed outside. It was indoors for 5 years, and I used to think I was safe, but I wasn't. I was just a vegetable."

After stepping out here, being excited about exploring the world to my heart's content, carrying fvcking money around, asking where a fast food restaurant was, oh my gosh I was an idiot! Still I was, ecstatic about experiencing everything for the first time in a long time, but after a bit, I thought everyone out here were prisoners, until I found out that even if they don't get to see things the way I do, they're not the one's imprisoned.