The Hope Journal

The Hope Journal-Chapter 7 (Sara)

Chapter 7

~Sara~

     Renee once told me, before she left, that Sam got Aspergers because of the vaccines that the doctors made him take when he was younger, vaccines that no one else in my family had to take. The doctors, however, say that Sam got Aspergers from certain problems with the pregnancy that I don't really want to go into. Dad always said that it was because Renee had too many kids and was being punished. Me? I believe that it was God. I'm not a religous person by any means, I wasn't raised like that. But, God gave Sam Aspergers for a reasons, and I believe that that reason was me.

     Whenever I'm stressed or upset, I take a walk. It calms me down. So, after Sam went up to his room, I turned off the TV, grabbed my coat, and walked outside into the damp, Spring air. I wouldn't call the neighborhood that we live in, Spring Grove Gardens, the best neighborhood. Sure, the name sounds nice but, the people in the neighborhood aren't exactly nice. Renee moved in here when Dad moved out. She sold the farm right away for the money and moved us into a crappy ranch house that always needs fixing up. I am constantly having to hire people to fix this or to fix that. Sometimes I ask myself, Sara, why couldn't Sam be facsinated with fixing things? Why does it have to be bugs? I'm not going to try to change Sam though. It just doesn't work that way. I'm trying to change the way that he interacts with people. It's a lot harder than I thought because his last tutor, Alexa, left when she graduated college. I've been searching for a new mentor for a while now, but no one really fits what I need as of right now.

     The last time that I talked to Sam's doctor he told me that I need to find someone that relates to Sam. Maybe someone with the same age as him. Ha. Where in the world am I going to find some fourteen year old who knows how to teach a kid with Aspergers about social interaction? It just isn't going to happen.

     I began walking out of the neighborhood. It was dark out but I could see perfectly fine because of the glowing blue street lamps on every corner. I wasn't sure where I was going, I just needed to get out of the house. I was crying, but I didn't know why. You know when you have so much stress building up on you and sometimes you just cry, for no seemingly apparent reason? Well, that's how I felt.

     When I got out of Spring Grove Gardens, I turned right and began walking towards East Market Street. When I got to East Market Street I suddenly had a craving for ice cream and I knew exactly where I wanted to go. Mamma Mia's Ice Cream Parlor. It was my favorite place to go when Renee was still here to take care of Sam. I would leave them and go hang out with Mamma Mia, eating chocolate chip ice cream with forks and talking about the good old days. I hadn't been there in years but suddenly I couldn't think of any other place where I would rather be.

     I remember when Mamma Mia's Ice Cream Parlor opened. I was in middle shcool and everyone would come here late at night to get ice cream. It was opened all year round and it was owned by Mamma Mia. A big, black lady who never seemed to age. She always knew just what to say when you were down. She had her quirks about her though. Like eating ice cream with a fork or making crazy ice cream flavors that only the brave people would eat. She was like my second mother but when Renee left I had to stop coming and getting ice cream. Sam can't eat ice cream because it's not gluten-free so I never brought him along.

     That night, the ice cream parlor was the only shop along the street that was lit up. I could see Mamma Mia cleaning up inside and I walked across the street. The parlor was closed but I hoped that Mamma Mia remembered me and would let me in. I wiped my eyes on my coat sleeve and opened the old wooden door. A small bell jingled above me and Mamma Mia looked up. Her dark eyes, a mix of chocolate and honey, glanced over me uncertainly and then a wide grin crossed her face.

     "Well, if it isn't Sara," she said putting down her rag and coming over to greet me.

     "Hi, Mamma Mia," I said as she came closer. Instead of just standing there like I thought she was going t, she gathered me into a big bear hug.

     "Now Sara, how many times have I told you to only call me Mamma," she said to me looking in my eyes. "I'm your stand-in-mother remember?" I remembered and I smiled. "Now sweety, what has brought you here tonight?" She asked seeing that I had been crying.

     "Well, I was upset and I was wondering if I could get some of your famous ice cream." She ushered me over to the bar where I hopped up onto a well worn chair.

     "Chocolate Chip?" she asked me already knowing the answer.

     "Of course," I smiled and looked around. The place hadn't changed at all. The peeling blue and white paint, the ice cream wallpaper border, the red booths, and Mamma Mia working behind the counter. Sitting there, it felt as if nothing had changed. Like I was back in middle school again. Mamma placed a huge dish of ice cream in front of me and passed me a fork. I smiled and began to dig in while she talked. We talked about the store and about life. We even talked about her no good money stealing husband who left her. We talked about almost everything. Everything but my family. When I was done, I thanked her and stood up. I realized I didn't have any money. "Mamma?"

     "Yes Sara?"

     "I don't have any money on me," I told her looking down. When I looked up again, Mamma was smiling.

     "It's fine Sara. Next time you come, just bring double the amount," she said laughing and I knew that it was okay. "Oh, and Sara?" She stopped me as I was about to walk out the door. "Bring that brother of yours next time. I've got some gluten-free ice cream that I'm sure he would love to test."

Authors Note: So, how did you like that chapter?? You got to meet a new character! The next chapter will be up soon so until then, comment, vote, share, and fan!

Thanks,

Hope!