Immature Mistakes | mj.q✓

Twenty-Two

'Janine was a friend of Evelyn's, sort of. Well you know them, they liked each other in front of each other but away from each other they were trash-talking each other.' Ava started to explain, keeping her face away from Jiaqi's as she explained. 'And well...she liked you.'

Jiaqi was surprised with that statement, he hadn't really expected Yaowen's cousin to like him. She hadn't exactly shown him signs, or he was being a classic Jiaqi who sometimes failed to pinpoint when someone liked him. It wasn't the first time, it had happened before with several friends and he usually realized too late.

'And she was my classmate and,' Ava felt embarrassed admitting the next fact. 'I liked you too...a lot. Maybe a bit too much.'

'Okay,' Jiaqi answered to make her feel less awkward. He wanted to make it seem like her admission wasn't shocking.

'But Janine was closer to you, she could hang out with you because of Yaowen and it made me feel jealous. And it made me start to hate her. Worse still she knew about my crush and she rubbed it in my face.' she continued. 'And then one day Janine told me that you two were dating and it hurt like hell. I just lost my temper and beat her up, because you meant a lot to me.'

'You're the one who beat Janine up!?' Jiaqi asked with shock written on his features. 'How could a girl even do that? Over a boy who isn't hers?'

'You already know how I was raised, fighting comes so effortlessly to me. And I may have gone overboard that time because I was just too angry.' She spoke with regret. 'And when I realized what I had done, I just left her there and ran away.'

Jiaqi continued to listen with curiosity.

'And when she had recovered at the hospital, I surely thought she was going to expose me and I was going straight to jail or juvy. But instead she wrote me those texts and I couldn't say no...I didn't want to be exposed...'

'So why did Janine say it was me out of everyone out there?' Jiaqi asked her.

'Because she was mad that you never realized she liked you, she was mad that you acted like you were buddies and was even apparently hitting on other girls while she was around. So she wanted you to suffer.'

Jiaqi thought over it and took the information in. It seemed he had found his answer. It was painful but it somehow provided a breath of relief.

'So you were okay doing that to me? And you never even told me the truth while we were friends? When I asked you about Janine and was super worried you just ignored me when you knew the truth and knew what had happened.' he said painfully.

'I was scared Jiaqi. I didn't want to jeopardize our friendship when you realized that...'

'That I almost died because of something you did.' he finished her sentence. 'I overdosed on pills Evelyn, all because of something you did.'

'I felt bad, I really did. I even visited you at the hospital but you were unconscious. But to admit it would put me in so much trouble.'

Jiaqi got up from the bed. 'No you were selfish, in fact you are selfish, because you could have at least told me this when we became friends and I was asking you about Janine. But you were fine seeing me in all that trouble and confusion. Then you never cared about me.'

Ava looked at him painfully, not sure what to say. She felt a mixture of shame, conviction and fear – fear of what Jiaqi would decide to do.

'But I did care, you are my friend – my first friend. I just...didn't know how to ever admit this.'

Jiaqi sighed. 'You almost cost me my life, my education, my freedom, my friends. And you never said anything. And you know what Ava...I started to like you too...I mean like as in romantic feelings...but I don't think I like you anymore. And I don't think I'll be able to help you anymore.'