Danganronpa Oneshots

When You Wake - Hajime X Nagito (short)

Request. CW: Derealization

It was a short list, and Hajime went through it every morning.

Five things you can see.

The ceiling. The window. The walls. The curtains. His dresser.

Four things you can feel.

The blankets. The headache. The cool air in the room. Hunger.

Three things you can hear.

The fan whirring softly, because he'd forgotten to shut it off. The clock ticking. His own breathing.

Two things you can smell.

...that one always felt pointless to him. His room didn't really smell like anything.

One thing you can taste.

"Tastes like fuck this. This doesn't help." Hajime growled to himself as he finally got up and out of bed, utterly unsatisfied with the exercise. The point of it was to remind himself that he wasn't in the simulation anymore, but he'd been able to see, feel, hear, smell, and taste things perfectly normally in the neo-world program. It didn't help. Nothing really helped.

Hajime looked to the mirror. It was covered. He liked to keep it that way most days. He was still adjusting, and sometimes it was easier not to see. The constant headache was enough on it's own.

And it was worse than usual today. A groan escaped him as he let himself sink back to his bed, rubbing at the spots on his temples where the skin was torn and raw from attaching and detaching electrodes for the machine that controlled the neo-world program. He'd spent weeks going in and out of it to wake the others, and it had taken a toll on him.

But think about the others, he told himself angrily. They all still met up every morning, and if he didn't show they'd know something was wrong. Focus on them, ignore the pain, get up. Get up.

Most mornings it worked, but today it didn't. Managing to stand again only resulted in being washed back again by a wave of dizziness and nausea. An undignified whimper escaped him as the world spun.

"Fuck that hurts..." He mumbled, allowing himself to lie back down again in hopes that it would ease the dizziness. Maybe, if he closed his eyes, just for a second...

The next thing he knew, someone was knocking on his door. He groaned, looking at the clock. A significant amount of time had passed. He'd fallen asleep without realizing it.

The second knock sent bolts of pain through his skull. "Hajime?"

"What?" He groaned, unable to keep the pain out of his voice.

"...you sound unwell." The voice, Hajime now recognized it as Nagito's, was now laced with concern. "May I come in?"

Hajime was tempted to say no. To send Nagito away. To suffer alone. He didn't want to be seen like this. But his desire for comfort led him to speak before he'd fully decided on saying no. "...yeah."

Nagito entered quietly. He was carrying a small plate of food and a glass, and he set both on Hajime's nightstand. "The others were concerned when you didn't come meet with everyone for breakfast," Nagito explained quietly. "So I offered to come check on you. Are you alright?"

Hajime barely raised his head to look at the other boy. "...no."

"Can I ask what's wrong?" His voice was so gentle, like he was afraid he could harm Hajime with just his words.

"My head..." was all Hajime could manage for an explanation.

Nagito nodded, sympathy in his eyes. "Mine hurt a lot after you woke me up. Going back into the program so many times... I can't imagine how awful it must feel. What can I do to help?"

Hajime closed his eyes. "How do I even know this is real? I went in and out of so many simulations and they were all just as real as this... thinking about it makes the headache worse but I can't not..."

"I don't know if there's a way to tell, Hajime. But think of it this way. If this is a simulation, isn't it a beautiful one?"

"What do you mean?" Hajime mumbled, some part of his subconscious leading him to rest his hand on Nagito's as the pale boy sat beside him.

Seeing this as an invitation, Nagito gently held Hajime's hand. "I mean, we're all here. We're all safe. We're all learning to live with what's happened. If this is a simulation, I certainly think it's a pleasant one."

"Never thought of it that way... thanks Nagito."

"Oh, anything for you, Hajime." Nagito said softly. "Glad I could help."

"...can you stay?" Hajime asked quietly, in a moment of weakness.

"Of course. You should rest, but I'll be here when you wake. Would you like me to lay with you?"

Hajime didn't answer, but he didn't need to. He simply curled up and shifted over for Nagito. He felt arms wrap around his chest, holding him close, and he let himself relax. Nagito was right after all. Even if this wasn't real, it was still a beautiful moment, and that was enough to lull him into a more peaceful sleep.