Emily: derek trying to flex when he's illiterate is so funny 😭
Rossi: I'm confused
Hotch: when are you not?
Rossi: Okay fair enough
JJ: Emily stop asking for tit pics
Emily: WHY DID YOU SAY THAT IN THE GC WHAT THE FUCK🤬
Derek: ayo who's tryna send titties to my line???😋😋😋
Y/n: Aaron fire him rn
Emily: ^ Aaron?🧐🧐 hm... thats suspicious.... that's weird.....
Y/n: you know what else is suspicious and weird? Your mom in my bed last night
Derek: pics or it didn't happen
Hotch: wait you slept with Emily's mom?
Y/n: a your mom joke
Hotch: oh!
Emily: LMAO OKAY THAT WAS KINDA GOOD TBH 😭 SHUT UP
Derek: old man discovers what your mom jokes are (colorized, 4k) 😹
Hotch: I am not that much older than you 🤨
Y/n: Derek's in denial about the fact that he's not 12 anymore
Derek: damn are yall bangin or smth why are you on his side 🧐👎🏾👎🏾
Y/n: Why would I be on YOUR side like ever hotch>you
Emily: no fr Derek ur a menace 😨 no one will ever be on your side till you behave
Derek: Y/N YOU JUST PROVED MY POINT FUCK YOU YALL FUCKING WITHOUT ME???
Reid: That's none of anyone's business.
JJ: Derek is really just making up stuff so he can be a terror to us all
Y/n: tbh I WISH we were but we aren't Derek so chill out damn you're too loud
Hotch: Wish?
Y/n: GOTTA GO WALK MY WATER BYE GUYS 🧑🦯🧑🦯🏃
Derek: punching the air rn 😪😪 damn heart been broke so many times I I don't know what to believe 💔 😔
Emily: ... 🦗 🦗 ...
Emily: damn yall hear that?
Derek: .
Emily: it's the sound of NOBODY giving a single FUCK 💃🏻💃🏻🤗
Reid: I care, Derek. Are you okay?
Derek: kiss me to make me feel better?
Reid: I don't care anymore, nevermind.
JJ: 💀💀
Hotch: Derek aren't you pansexual?
Derek: yes sir I am😋 want me to prove it?
Hotch: go fuck a pan and stop sexually harassing us
Emily: SHUT UP😭😭 HOT TOPIC SNAPPED
Y/n: HOT TOPIC💀 PLEASE
Hotch: jack wanted to go in there and when we did someone threatened to hang me from the ceiling with my tie so we haven't returned
Emily: HUH???? WHAT THE FUCK 😭??
Y/n: No bc what'd you do 💀
Hotch: I commented on the fact that it's very...edgy.. in there, not in a mean way, but someone over heard and got upset and said that so we left
Hotch: jack cried it was kinda funny
Derek: BRO WHAT 😨😨 IF SOMEONE SAID THAT TO ME I D CRY 😭 TF
Y/n: hotch going through never ending trauma (real not clickbait like actually)
Emily: wait was it a customer or a worker bc if it was a worker that's o much funnier
Rossi: what's a hot topic?
Derek: your dad 👨🏻 ♥
Rossi: oh?
Hotch: a customer, specifically a 13 year old girl
Y/n: ...
Y/n: TGATS SO FUNNY I AM SO SORDY SHUT UP😭😭
Emily: should've punched her tbh 💃🏻💃🏻
JJ: we don't git children Emily
Emily: Okay sorry
Hotch: Why do you all want me to hit everyone who slightly inconvinences me
Emily: *someone threatens to murder you* "oh just a slight inconvenience!" 😐
Y/n: we say it because watching you punch people would be hot cmon man
Derek: ^ BIG AGREE BIG AGREE 🤤 FUCKKKK 🥵🥵👨🏻🍼🤰🏻
Hotch: Why are you the way that you are
Emily: the white emojis😭😭
Derek: I know I'm a comedian, clap for me 😝😝
Rossi: hey guys I made food!
Y/n: I am running to your house rn at alarmingly fast speeds
Emily: FU K OME RIGHT FUCKING NOW I WIL L RUN PEOPLE OVER I DO NOT FUCKING CSRE FUCK YEAH FOOD !
JJ: oh
YOU ARE READING
BAU groupchat + Reader
Fanfictionhow I think the BAU team would text eachother except you're also on the team dealing with their antics Some stuff is out of character and I exaggerated their personalities for comedic value, enjoy!
