upside down triangle

18 1 1
                                    

social media
the great debate.
the supposed root
to all issues,
problems.

i feel disgusting,
like a big scary monster.
it's eating away at my flesh
"you don't have the perfect body,
face,
hips,
stomach.
eat less
but eat more,
grow your butt,
lips,
eyes,
hair,
chest but not back
you'll look bulky.

shrink your stomach,
nose,
waist,
arms,
cheeks but no,
not your jaw."

look perfect
but don't,
because now you look fake.
be you, naturally
but now your not perfect
you're ugly, shameful,
should not be seen in public.

be tall
but if you are
men don't like you anymore.
have long legs, torso, arms.
you do?
now your a giant, lanky,
a spider, too intimidating for boys.
be short,
you're a child, cute, unprofessional, immature
just grow, get taller again.

it's so numbing.

why can't i enjoy sport
without worrying
about what it's shaping my body to be
manly, not feminine.

i "mustn't eat"
but in my stomach, chin?
oh you're unhealthy, overweight

it hurts
the comparison,
but i love it.
it's kind,
familiar,
it makes everything stop,
for a second,
just to bring it back stronger.

by o.p.


comforting or deadly? or both?

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