Stardom

Reckless Abandon

I silently threw up thanks to whoever made that easier than I dared hope, and then waited as he scanned the rota for the following week.

I left the office a while later, and got to work, an extra two shifts a week now pencilled in for the foreseeable future. Something which I was feeling rather happy about as I took in the busy crowd gathered for the night. After the monumental cock-up today had been, I was so stressed out that I felt like I could have sat and cried for an entire day, stuck in a wallowing pit of self-loathing and misery. But here, when I was able to let loose, push everything else from my mind and surround myself with people who wanted me, I didn't feel that way. I felt strong, powerful. I felt like I was invincible like I could do anything, and it was a fucking rush, an addictively incredible feeling that I didn't want to give up. As far as I was concerned, for now, at least, I was done with the acting. Done with feeling so easily cast aside, so worthless and insignificant. Every audition I was going on, left me feeling mediocre at best, and I just couldn't take it anymore. I didn't see why I should waste hours of my life, rehearsing, fighting and clawing for something that I wasn't going to get when I could put my effort somewhere that I was getting something back... here, on stage, and in private.

Taking a deep breath, I shook off my earlier drama and faced my shift with a renewed purpose, I was ready to dive in, find the perfect pick-me-up among the crowd. Honing in on a large group of businessmen in the VIP area, I tugged at my top a little to make sure it gave an added boost to my cleavage, and set off toward them, flashing the hottest guy there, a smile on the way past, shaking my hips a little. Sure enough, moments later when I reached the bar, he followed over, leaning beside me, his eyes roaming over me with lusting hunger.

"As pretty as my waitress is, I think I'd definitely prefer you serving me," He smiled.

I laughed, gesturing for Davey to pour a couple of shots.

"I don't think so," I replied sweetly, leaning in close enough to whisper, "If I was your waitress, then you'd miss out on all the other things I can do for you."

Plucking the shots from the bar, I handed one to him, clinked it with my own and threw it back.

"And just what are these other things?" He pressed, throwing his own shot back, his green eyes never wavering from my face.

"Pay for a private dance and find out."

With a wink, I passed by, making sure to allow my hand to brush against his arm as I passed.

Not even ten minutes later, I was summoned upstairs by security, and shown into a private booth where the same guy was seated, waiting for me.

"Curiosity won out," He said as I entered, relaxing against the sofa and watching me intently. "Just as you intended, I'm sure."

I flashed him an innocent smile, earning a hearty laugh in response.

"I'll make it worth your while," I assured him.

With every passing second that I was in his company, I found my self-esteem rising, my confidence returning after today's smackdown. I felt the familiar prickle of excitement rushing through my veins as I put on the music and drew nearer to him, beginning a teasing dance that gradually gained momentum. His hands were all over me, his cock hardening in his lap as I ground against him, my breasts free of their confines, my lingerie draped over the arm of the sofa whilst his lips pressed against my neck and my blood heated with a burning need for more. It was intoxicating to be this close to him, to know he wanted me, and to have the power to deny him more than I was willing to give. He groaned as I slipped from his lap, slowly sliding my panties from my legs and shimmying provocatively just out of his reach.

"You're one fucking sexy woman," He growled, moving to the edge of his seat and reaching for me.

As soon as his arm wrapped around my waist, I pushed him back firmly, grinning wickedly as he fell back against the cushions. My aggressive rebuff did nothing to discourage him though, and he eyed me eagerly as I backed into him, rocking my hips to give him a closer look at my rapidly dampening pussy, teasing him with what he wanted, and getting off on his reaction.

By the end of my shift, I'd done more private dances in one night than ever before, and I was on a high that I never wanted to come down from. My entire body was charged, as though electricity was coursing through every nerve. I felt strong, happy, aroused... so many things all at once and I was loving every second.

"I saw you took on more shifts," Crystal commented as she closed her locker beside me, straightening her jacket.

"Yeah, just a couple more a week for now."

"For now?" She repeated, "Isn't it going to cut into your auditioning time?"

I shrugged tugging my own jacket from inside and dragging it on.

"I'm sorta done with that," I said simply.

"What?" Crystal asked uneasily, "What do you mean, done with it?

I slammed my locker door and turned to face her,

"I mean, I'm done with making myself look like an idiot. I go to every damn audition I can, I work myself into the ground trying to perfect every single role, no matter how small it is, and I still can't break through."

She sighed, giving me a sympathetic look.

"You can't just give up though, Lena. It's rough on everyone who wants to make it in a competitive industry. This is LA, it's competition central," She laughed, "You've only given it a few months, some people try for years without making it, but they keep trying."

I knew that she was right about that, but at the moment, I was sick of trying.

"I know that, but I figured something would have come up by now, but it hasn't. I'm Sick of fighting for things that I want. I've fought to keep my relationship, fought for an acting job. I'm just tired of fighting. I want to revel in something, enjoy feeling good, and have some fun for a while," I shrugged, "That's easy to do here."

"And it's easy to get stuck here too," She bit back, her expression turning angry. "I've lost count of how many girls I've seen pass through those doors looking for something to subsidise their dream. Only intending to work this job for a few months, a couple of years tops, and then they get sucked in, they forget why they started and get stuck in this world."

I rolled my eyes at her dramatic tone, throwing my bag over my shoulder and strolling away, unwilling to let her ruin my buzz.

"It's just a few extra shifts, Crystal. Chill out."