The Orphan in the TARDIS

Chapter Twenty-Five

"And now the world is worth conquering. So the Zygons are invading the future from the past."

"Exactly."

"Okay, but earth is a rubbish place to invade, no matter the era. Except maybe when the dinosaurs, and Silurians ran the planet. Then again, no one would've invaded then, because Silurian's were totally bad*rses."

This time Sandshoes rolls his eyes at his friends' antics, before he leans toward the Queen, "And do you know why I know that you're a fake? Because you're such a bad copy. It's not just the smell, or the unconvincing hair, or the atrocious teeth, or the eyes just a bit too close together, or the breath that could stun a horse. It's because my Elizabeth, the real Elizabeth, would never be stupid enough to reveal her own plan. Honestly, why would you do that?"

"Because it's not my plan. And I am the real Elizabeth," she argues.

Sophie holds back her laugh at the look of terror that skirted across the Time Lords face, "Okay. So, backtracking a moment just to lend context to my earlier remarks."

"My twin is dead in the forest. I am accustomed to taking precautions." From within the folds of her skirt, she pulls out a dagger, showing it to the squad.

Sophie smiles, "See. I knew there was a reason I liked you. Of course, I carry a sword. but a dagger is definitely less conspicuous."

Sandshoes turns, "Can you please stop talking before you get yourself killed?"

"These Zygon creatures never even considered that it was me who survived rather than their own commander," Elizabeth says, side-eyeing the girl. "The arrogance that typifies their kind."

"Zygons?" Clara asks.

"Men."

"And you actually killed one of them?" the teacher asks, sounding impressed.

"I may have the body of a weak and feeble woman, but at the time, so did the Zygon." Turning to look at the pinstriped Doctor, she continues, "The future of my kingdom is imperilled. Doctor, can I rely on your service?"

"Well, I'm going to need my TARDIS."

"It has been procured already."

"Ah," he nods, smiling at the Queen.

"But first, my love," Elizabeth continues, her hand touching his cheek gently, "you have a promise to keep."

Sophie physically places her hands over her mouth so she doesn't burst out laughing. Her whole body shakes as she holds back the laughter. The eldest Doctor turns, merely shaking his head at her. He slowly just runs her back until her laughter subsides and she begins to breathe normally again.

It's not even ten minutes later that the squad are up on the palace lawn, a wedding canopy over the heads of Sandshoes and the Queen. "I think this may have been the fastest wedding set up I've ever seen," Sophie mutters, leaning toward Clara, "And I've been to Vegas."

The teacher smiles over at her, "I love weddings, don't you?"

"Oh yeah," the girl grins, "Especially when it's an embarrassing mistake the Doctor made. That makes weddings so much better."

"I've only met you once y'know," Clara says, "But I just jumped into his time stream, which you'll find out about later, but I saw you way more times than I expected."

"Oh yes. We've been together through thick, and through thin."

The Doctor's standing near each other look at Sophie, each one smiling.

"I now pronounce you man and wife," the clergyman says, loudly. Sophie's head turns back to the wedding, Clara cheering, and throwing confetti onto the new couple's heads, while the clergyman adds, "You may kiss the bride."

The Queen grabs the Time Lord's face, pressing her lips firmly against his, very enthusiastically.

"Is there a lot of this in the future?" the Warrior asks, turning to his older self.

"It does start to happen, yeah."

Elizabeth pulls back from her husband, keeping her hand entwined with his. "God speed, my love."

He starts away, releasing her hand, "I will be right back," he calls to her, while running to his TARDIS.

Sophie tuts, following him into the ship, "Wow, you're starting your relationship with lies. No wonder she wants to behead you."

"She makes a good point," his older self states, "That does explain a lot."

The pinstriped Time Lord ignores them, flipping a few switches on the console, "Right then, back to the future."

Sophie smirks, "Great scott, Doc."