Episodic memories

Elsewhere

I talked with my dad recently.

We've gotten a lot closer as I grew up. It was not always that way, but I am glad that we are getting closer as I am getting older. It's been refreshing to have deep chats together.

We were sitting on the couch, talking about how ever since I was a kid, I wanted to be elsewhere. Not that I don't like where I'm from. That's not it at all.

I just want to experience something else. Something new.

He said, comparing my sister and me, "your sister, I had to push for her to get out there and get out of her comfort zone, and you... I had to hold you back a little. You were so eager. And you still are. I'm glad."

He said, "I remember when you were six, you were standing in your grandparents' backyard when a plane flew over the house, and your eyes were glued to that plane. You turned to your grandma and said, 'One day, I'll be in there too.' I knew then you were not going to want to stay here."

I still haven't changed my mind.

My dad also said, "it's really funny, though, you're the one who wants to leave the most, and when you're away on vacation, the person I get the most news from, is you. Despite your sister being a homebody and being close by, I get the most news from you. You call and text often."

I think that's why I call and text so often, I want them to know that, despite my strong desire to leave, I'm not leaving my relationship with my family.

I just want to be elsewhere.