fuckboy

chapter i

Y/N's P.O.V.

I looked around at the faces of people I'd only seen in magazines and movie screens my entire life. It was crazy to think that this was my reality now. When I posted that video only two months ago, I had no idea I'd become a viral sensation, the object of a dispute between multiple labels, and have my entire future rewritten from what I'd expected to become.

And yet, here I was. Living the dream - even though it'd never been mine - in L.A. of all places, trying to figure out who I could trust in this beast of an industry that seemed as far removed from kind as possible.

Luckily, I'd made a few friends who seemed honest enough. A few singers reached out to welcome me into their inner circle, and then I met a few actors and actresses in the gatherings they threw, which was how I ended up in this party filled with almost exclusively big movie stars, accompanying Brie freaking Larson.

I still couldn't believe she was someone I could call a friend now. I'd find myself constantly freaking out whenever I looked over my phone to see that she was calling me, or looking up to see her offering me a beer, as she was doing right now.

"Come sit with us, we're messing around with Chris. He's fun." Looking over, I realized the Chris she was referring to was, in fact, her marvel colleague, Chris Evans - someone who'd starred in quite a lot of my daydreams back when I was a teenager.

I was still enough of a fan to know just how fun he could be at parties. I'd seen videos of him playing drinking games, jumping over entire counters... He'd always seemed like the life of a party in general. Seeing him at that one, surrounded by his friends - many of whom I'd come to know already - solidified the idea I had of him in my mind.

"Chris, this is my friend Y/N." I noticed the way he looked me up and down. I couldn't say I didn't like it, it's not every day you get to meet your celebrity crush and know that he was at least a little bit interested in you. But the thrill of being noticed easily disappeared from my tired body, as I sent him a little smile.

I still wasn't ready to date, and I don't think I would be for a while.

"Oh, hey! Nice to meet you. I saw your video, you really sing like an angel." I was sure there were no evident signs of my feelings in my expression, but I think he knew the effect his words had on me, with the way I avoided his eyes as I took a seat next to Brie on the couch. But I guess that was expected, considering he was almost twice my age. I was sure that experience with women is something he didn't exactly lack.

We'd interrupted some sort of friendly banter, but it didn't take long for them to get right back to it, and it seemed like Chris was the main subject of everyone's attention. "Man, you're almost forty!" Someone I didn't really recognize teased him, and he rolled his eyes as he took a swig of his beer.

I had to admit I watched his throat as he leaned back to swallow it, and it did make my mouth dry for a little while.

"Yeah, so?" He countered, making everyone laugh as I pondered the situation over in my own head. He really was almost forty, but here he was, on a Friday night, at a place packed with single people, wearing a tank top with a flannel and a baseball cap turned to the wrong side.

He didn't look forty, he looked like a teenager. A muscly, handsome teenager, but a teenager nonetheless. If it was anyone else, I'm sure I'd been turned off by his outfit. But as it were, the teenager that still lived inside of me could only gawk and fawn over him.

In my mind, of course.

"So you should be married already! Isn't this what you want?" The question caught me by surprise, so much so that a snort left me before I could realize it. The second I did though, my hand covered my lips, in too much of a shock to even immediately apologize for it.