Untouched (BWWM)

Forty-Three|Reassuring you

She was happy to let it go. As she claimed "your place is so much better."

The plan is to live there for a few years before moving to a suburban area when Kiren and Kai is three maybe four. Especially an area with good schools but that's awhile from now. They aren't even one yet.

Speaking of Kiren and Kai Eureka reminded me when I was leaving they have a doctor's appointment tomorrow. They'll be getting checked up and receiving shots.

>>>>

"Detka I'm home!"

I step into the home, hearing wailing upstairs. Layered with the sound of Eureka's pacing. I leave my jacket on the clothing rack and head upstairs.

Going into the nursery which is across from our room. The door is wide open with a pacing Eureka who has her hands full with two crying babies. She looks overwlemed and stressed out.

"What happened baby?"

"Good your here. Help me please! I don't know what to do. They won't stop crying."

Kiren is in her arms as she rocks him from side to side in attempt to soothe him, meanwhile Kai is in his rocking baby bed which automatically self-rocks. He's crying too.

I go to pick up Kai who stops crying as soon has I hold him in my arms His loud cry lulls to soft breathing. I go to Eureka handing him to her while taking Kiren standing close beside her so Kai can see me.

"Okay Kiren, okay bud. Daddies here. Everything's okay." I sooth while holding him against my chest, hand on his hair. He continues crying for awhile then soon calms down. After a few more minutes he falls asleep. Probably tired from all his crying. I hate hearing them cry. It feels likes my heart is breaking.

I look up from his face to find Eureka staring at me as if I was a messiah. She has tears in her deep brown eyes. Causing me to feel another ping in my chest. I don't like seeing her upset.

"What's wrong sweetheart?"

I lay Kiren down then hold Kai to try and lull him to sleep as well. Going over to her as she sits in the sofa.

"I feel like I'm a bad mother. I can't do anything right." Eureka cries covering her eyes. My baby is so stressed out. I close my eyes wondering what will make her feel better.

She's not a bad mother.

"Detka look at me please."

"I can't get them to stop crying or to sleep like you can. I can't do anything right."

I move over to the two white cribs on the left laying Kai down. He's now fast a sleep like his brother. Turning to face my love. She's curled up on the chair, arms wrapped around herself. Sniffles leaves her, rocking her body with feelings of inadequacy.

I lean over and take her hands in mine. Slowly. Moving them from her face. Detka keeps her eyes closed.

"Hey I know for a fact you're not a bad mother baby. Talk to me sweetheart. Tell me what happened before I came home."

Detka wraps her hands around my torso. I sit drawing her onto my lap. She tucks her face in my neck, holding me tightly as if I'm the only think keeping her afloat.

"I gave them a bath after I breastfed them earlier. After that I dressed them I thought they'd need a nap so I tried lulling them to sleep when Kiren started crying out of nowhere which made Kai cry too. I couldn't get them to stop crying no matter what I did. I tried holding them like you do but it didn't work. That's when you arrived."

"That doesn't sound like a bad mother to me. You kept trying to soothe them. You didn't give up. You did your best baby."

Detka pulls away showing me her dried eyes which still glisten with unshed tears. Cool brown speckled clear with those tears. She looks so fucking beautiful. Holding her face I wipe underneath her eyes with my thumb. Leaning in I kiss her forehead, then her lips. A gentle sweet peck I hope will convey how much she means to me. How proud I am of her.