His Soul

Chapter 23

How do you tell someone that you forgive them? That you wanted nothing but to be in their arms, love them, take care of them, be there in their ups and downs of life till the death do us apart?

I have accepted the fact that nobody is perfect. There will be chances where they will hurt us, disappoint us or upset us unintentionally and sometimes will not even know what did they do wrong until you tell them.

I love Sid enough to forgive him.

Yes!

I do love Sid.

I don't know when I started loving him or I don't know if I have been in love with him from the start and realised it just a few days ago. 

I was blinded by the disappointment, the broken heart, the betrayal and the dark secret because of which I didn't acknowledge my love for him, heck, I even thought that I hated him. At some point, I wanted to take some kind of revenge against him.

However, truth to be told, I could never watch Sid in pain. Not back then and not now. It hurts me to be apart from him. I feel restless if he ever comes home late to me. My heart aches painfully whenever he tries to hide his emotions behind his cold facade. I felt empty when he went to Germany.

I wanted nothing but to take his aches, his pain, and his stress away. I wanted nothing but to see him happy. That genuine happy face which I have yet to discover. I wonder how handsome he will look when pure happiness would be gleaming on his face.

I know he has been hiding something dark behind his cold heart just like me.
Trust me, you know it when someone is going through the indescribable pain, the horrible situation you have gone through.

Slowly but surely Sid is making my life better, making my life a living worth, making this earth, a better living place for me. Before him, I was just breathing, living a dead life. Trying hard to look happy, and peaceful for my family and best friends' sake, so they could pass over that horrible incident and not be stuck in there, helping me out.

But now, everything's different. He has given meaning to my life. Now, I'm willing to live, dreaming of spending the rest of my life with him.

Even though he can be an ass sometimes just like yesterday he was at the market and yet I couldn't stop or control my feelings for him.

They say you wouldn't know someone's value till they are no longer in your life and I have taken a glimpse of that when Sid went to Germany.

Love isn't just a word. It's hard work, trust, and tears, with even a few glimpses of the devastations. But at the end of each day, I'll still look at Sid, by my side and can't imagine anyone else. I'm willing to struggle with him, just so we can build together and be with each other.

If this isn't love then I don't know what is.

The real question is, how the hell I'm going to confess my feelings to him? How the hell I'm going to tell him that I forgive him for everything?

Nonetheless, I have been getting this uneasy feeling from the moment I opened my eyes this morning. I don't know what is it. I don't know what my- our future held for us but this bad gut feeling was starting havoc in my mind.

I tried to push that feeling aside and stared down at Sid as he subconsciously nuzzled his face more into my naked chest. Goosebumps appeared on my skin as his hot breath fanned my chest.

He had longer and thicker eyelashes than me. Pointed nose, his chiselled jaw and those unforgettable soft lips which can do the sinful thing to my body.

Heat crawled up to my face and a cheeky smile formed on my lips. I bit my lower lip as last night's memories started flashing through my eyes.

Last night was on another level. The urgency in our kisses, the urgency to feel each other was turning me on and I wanted nothing but to finally make love.