Haikyuu ships oneshots

~Osasuna~🖤

Here he goes again.

Osamu lays on the usual bed, sheets covering half of his naked body and small puffs of air leaving his mouth due to the cold, night air entering through the open balcony.

He's panting, his breaths short and shallow as if he just ran a hundred miles, his mind foggy (still busy trying to come off it's addictive high) and body completely lax. He feels good at this moment, so very good that he hopes this feeling never ends.

He knows it's a stupid thing to hope.

Once he feels good enough to exist, he turns his head to the open door and stares at the moon, trying his best to ignore the familiar figure that stood in its path. He's only wearing a loose white towel that cover half of his thighs and his scratch-covered back is on complete display to the grey-haired man.

His own lower back starts to pain at the sight and he's barely aware that his skin feels sticky and itchy. It's probably uncomfortable but he can't really seem to feel it.

A bunch of red, vivid hickeys are placed freshly on his neck and collarbone, and he vaguely curses at the fact that this is something he'll have to hide from everyone he knows: his brother, his parents, his friends, the world.

His brain starts feeling something close to normal five minutes later, his mind not foggy but blank and all of the emotions he tried to ignore coming down in a disarray.

He suddenly feels extremely cold.

He feels so so cold, both physically and mentally, that he wonder if any blanket in the world or warmth could ever fix it.

He pulls the rest of the covers up anyways, leaving only a small part of his forehead out of it. His body curls, curls and curls, until his knees are touching his stomach and his head seems to be glued to it, as if he's trying his best to hide himself from the outside world.

The corner of his eyes prickle with tears and his body starts to shake, shame and embarrassment replacing the nice -fake- high he felt only five minutes ago.

He promised himself that he wouldn't come back, no matter how much the other pleaded or begged but he couldn't keep his promise. Suna didn't even need to beg for him to come here. He came willingly. Like a whore.

Yes, Osamu thinks, I'm a complete whore. I'm a backup plan, a toy that my engaged best friend uses whenever he feels like it. I'm not someone as important to him anymore, just another quick fuck to take his mind off a bad volleyball match or a particularly tiring argument with his actual lover.

His tears finally start shedding at the reminder that he is not Suna's lover; he is his fuckbuddy, his whore, so much of a whore that he can't keep his own pants on when it comes to a taken man.

Rintarō Suna is a fine man. He's hot and funny, kinda rough around the edges but a whole piece of diamond whenever you got to know him. He's also the man that Osamu has always loved. Even after they broke up in high school, even after they moved to different cities, even after he found out that he was engaged, Osamu had always been in love with Sunarin.

And Suna always took advantage of that.

He feels even worse at the pending reveal. He could've stopped this the first time it happened, he knows he could've, but he never had the strength to do it before. He hates to admit, hates it so much, but he never denied him because it felt so good, so good to be used by the love of his life like this.

It felt (and still feels) good to know that whenever Suna needs to blow off some steam he calls Osamu, not Atsumu, not Kita, not anyone else, just him.

It feels good but it also feels so very awful.

Awful because no matter how much Osamu tries, he isn't the man Rin will go to bed with. Awful because no matter how much he wishes and prays for it, he'll never be the man Rin will hug and kiss at the alter, he'll never be the man Rin will love and he'll never be the man for Rin.

This thought of process hurts, hurts so much that he promises himself that today is the last time he comes back to Suna. He promises himself that today is the last time he betrays his friend's trust by hooking up with his fiancée and that today is the last time he lets himself be used by his best friend.

He promises himself -while ripping himself off the sheets and dressing in a hurry, tears streaming down his face and lower back paining like a bitch- that he won't come back to this.

He ignores Suna's calls of worry and confusion once he realizes what's happening and runs out of the apartment like his life depends on it, promising himself multiple times that today was the last time he accepted this.

Unfortunately, he's just a man in love so it's no surprise that when Rin calls again for him 3 weeks later, he runs.

                                       889 words

A/N: it's funny that when I do one of my favorite ships one shot for the first time it's an angst :)
Re-write!!