Wondering

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"Ehm...Adora, didn't you say you have a weekend job?" The brunette, deadly laid on the couch, with her head in the girl's lap, asked.
"Yeah, I called and said there was a family emergency. I never skip it, so they understood I was serious and let me be." She answered, keeping her eyes glued on her book.
"Ah, ok...what job is it?" She questioned out of boredom.
The blonde got the hint and closed the book, putting it on the arm of the sofa.
"Nothing exciting, I'm just a barista. I tried to help at Mermista's clothes shop, but I was so bad at helping costumers they though I was colorblind. Luckily at Spinnarella and Netossa's bar things go way better." Adora told her.
"Yeah, you are kinda basic about fashion, sometimes it looked like you never changed." Catra mocked her, earning a smack on the head.
"Ehy! I got booboo, you can't hurt me!" The brunette complained with a fake pout.
"Alright, sorry big baby." She teased chuckling.
"I'm not a baby, I'm a tough sexy woman with headache." The latina protested.
"Sure thing, baby." Adora joke again, receiving a pinch on the waist.
"Ouch! That was not necessary!" She said offended.
"Neither the smack, but you did it." Catra replied.
"Call it even?" The blonde purposed.
"Whatever, princess." The brunette accepted, trying her best not to smile.
"Aw! You haven't called me that in ages: still don't like it, but it's a progress."Adora exclaimed happily, starting to play with the girl's hair.
"You huge sap! It was meant to annoy you!" She scoffed.
"Don't care." The other muttered still joyful, with the most heartwarming smile, that made the girl in her lap blush.
"Could I like you any less?" Catra wondered.
"Uh! Wanna watch Friends? Bow let us use his Netflix family account: they are like a dozen, so his fathers went for the biggest option. It's very unlikely that all the screens are on at the same time before 9 pm." She told excitedly.
"Don't get me wrong, Chandler is my lifetime sarcastic role model, but I'm not really in the mood...they are too happy. What about Joker?" The brunette replied.
"A mentally disturbed person enjoying watching a film about how another mentally disturbed person turned into a super villan...that's your best idea. Should I worry?" Adora asked with a smirk.
"No problem, princess, you are not that much mentally disturbed. I would sleep with an open eye otherwise" Catra teased.
"Bold words from someone who killed a squirrel and brought it in our room." The blonde recalled.
"Again, it was an accident! I didn't mean to hit it and I thought it would wake up soon or later. Besides, bold words from someone who married me anyways." The latina shoot back, making Adora burst in laughter.
"Oh my god! Do you remember it? That really was a nice ceremony. We had even stolen those candy rings from the shop!" She said, trying to catch some air again.
"Yeah, we should call Lonnie, Rojelio and Kyle: those bitches never sent us any wedding gift." Catra added laughing.
"You're right, they owe us." The blonde played along.
"We could make them pay our honeymoon, we never had that too." The girl in her lap purposed.
"Oh no, we did that: we sneaked out and spent one night in Isaac Grande's treehouse." Adora said.
"Uh, yeah, I do remember coming back and being busted by Weaver. That time she really got angry." The brunette recalled with a grimace.
"...I'm sorry about that, I should have worked more to protect you." The other apologised.
"Yeah, well, staying would have been a good start." Catra pointed out.
"What do you mean? Didn't she ease on you when I left?" The blonde asked confused.
"You're joking, right? Without you caring about me I was turned into her punchball! She blamed you leaving on me! When you left nothing stopped her from hurting me! How could you not know it?!" The latina snapped at her, sitting up.
Adora's face turned in an expression of pure horror and she covered her mouth with the trembling hands, while those informations sinked in and she teared up.
"Did you really believe she wouldn't hurt me if you weren't there? How egocentric are you? How stupid? She hold back because someone in that hole knew my name! Of course she picked on me when you left to start living your perfect golden life! You left me alone with a fucking child abuser! What did you think would have happened?" Catra kept yelling next to her, ripping Adora piece by piece, ignoring her streaming tears, her violent but silent sobs and her desperate panting...untill the blonde stood up and bolted to the bathroom, to throw up even her soul.
"Adora? Adora what the fuck? What's happening to you?" The brunette asked, following her, terrified by her reaction, but as the girl saw her, she couldn't help but try to trow up more, even if nothing was left.
Her body kept shaking violently for the spasms of her diaphragm and she desperately held on the toilet, while Catra collected her hair up to not let it fall on her face
The brunette was now the one shocked: she had seen Adora pleading, crying, having nightmares, wounded and in the middle of crisis before...but she had never seen her so weak and vulnerable in their whole lives.

What did just happened?

"Are you ok?" She whispered helplessly to the pale girl, still leaned on the toilet.
Adora lifelessly moved away and tried to push herself up, but her muscles trembled too much to let her stand, so she leaned her back on the shower glass.
Her blue eyes were shut, while Catra's heterocromatics wandered on her figure.

She had broken Adora in how long? A day?

The guilt seemed to fill any inch of what was left of the brunette's heart and she looked at her like a lost puppy.

"Adora, what happened?" Catra asked, on the verge of a cry.
She really didn't know how longer she would have hold herself together in front of that sight.
Her mouth tried to open, but the blonde couldn't speak...she was just so empty and broken.
Adora covered her face with her hands, wishing to disappear.

Catra didn't really know what to do, she was usually the one who lost it and fell apart.
How could she fix it now? She did that!
At the end, she had destroyed Adora too, just like Miss Weaver used to say.

The latina crawled next to her and slowly embraced her, hugging her tightly to her chest.
"I'm sorry" She said, tearing up.

Adora had reached out to her since the moment she found out Catra had stepped in the apartment...and she payed her back pushing her away.

"I'm sorry, Adora, I'm so sorry!" She repeated again.

She would have wanted to say that she didn't mean to hurt her, but she did.
Catra was blinded by her own pain and just didn't realise how deeply she was hitting the blonde who now laid in her arms.

She had been so occupied fighting the ghost of the pain Adora had inflicted her three years before, the image of the traitor who left her, that she didn't understand that the real girl she met just yesterday, wasn't the same person.

Adora's only respond was her tight grip on a flap of Catra's shirt.

"I'm sorry, Adora...you are my family too." She admitted, starting to place kisses on her head.

Soon later the blonde started crying in her chest and the girl hold her even tighter, trying to embrace her with her whole body, to hide her and comfort her.

Why didn't they understand how to love each other?

It took an eternity before the two calmed down and Adora fell asleep, curled in Catra's chest.
The brunette tried to hold her the best she could and dragged her to her bad, where she would have rested better.
She tucked the tired friend in and started caressing her.
Adora seemed to wake up a bit, opening only one eye, and took Catra's hand in hers, bringing it closer.
She smiled painfully, still sorry for what happened, and when the blonde stove to move at the edge of the bed, the latina laid behind her, spooning Adora in a comforting and familiar embrace.

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