Imagine

It's Not Working?

Jordan and I agreed to meet up on Saturday evening at the Center City, a little but well known scatter of mountains just outside of town where you could see everything. We were going to have a picnic and watch the sun set. I convinced my mom to drive me and help me set up. Jordan would be the one to bring me back home that night since I couldn't drive and didn't have in interest in learning to.

I spent majority of the week going back and forth over the plan and avoiding Ariana. Sadly that meant avoiding Adriana too. I would have to turn Adriana down when I was invited for dinner, saying I had too much homework. The only times I saw her were in class or when she'd give me rides home.

   Once Ariana picked up on my obvious avoidance of her, she started going out of her way to try to socialize with me. I'd see her in the halls, and she'd try to walk me to class. At practice, she'd try to partner up with me. The only good thing was that we agreed, without ever discussing it, that whatever was between us stayed away from Adriana.

   What kind of friend does it make me to hook up with her sister and never tell her? Ariana definitely wouldn't be getting brownie points for sleeping with her sister's best friend. It was a tough situation to be caught in, so we did our best to not be caught.

By Thursday, it seemed that Ariana had finally given up and decided to leave me be. It was a relief to some degree, but it also gave me the feeling that she was just waiting for the right moment. I was creeped out, waiting for her to strike.

Friday went smoothly, and I began getting excited for my date with Jordan. Logically, having these thoughts in my head confused me. How could I feel this way about very different people? The lightness in my chest and the tingle in my fingertips told me not to question it though, so I didn't.

Saturday morning came and went. I went over how everything was meant to happen again and again. My mind was buzzing with thoughts, both positive and negative. It was exhilarating. I had forgotten how nice it was to like somebody knowing that they liked you back. I was setting up for something likely to actually bring me joy without the extreme highs and withdraws that came with the addiction I had to toxicity.

Jordan was different. I was really looking forward to see where things could go with her.

I packed my mom's trunk with everything I needed and we set out for Center City. I made a checklist of what needed to be done when we got there and started setting up the moment my mom put the car in park.

   My mom quickly left, and I texted her the second I heard Jordan's car pull up.

This was it. My first date with Jordan.

My nerves finally left, knowing that this was what I had prepared for. It was the same way I got before a game: nothing else mattered but right now. I took a deep breath to brace myself.

  I turned around to be met with Ariana stepping out of her car.

"I haven't seen you around much lately." She frowned dramatically. "If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were avoiding me."

"I am."

"That's unfortunate."

"Where is she?"

"Where is who?"

"You know exactly who I'm talking about. The girl that I'm supposed to be on a date with."

"I'm right here babe."

"Fuck off."

"That's how you treat your dates? No wonder she didn't want to be here."

"What do you mean she didn't want to be here?" I sounded small and insecure, and I hated it. I balled my fists at my sides, knowing that Ariana way trying to manipulate me and knowing that it was working.

"Isn't it obvious? She's not into you. She was using you. She wanted to get back at me for something stupid, and you were quick and easy bait."

"You're an asshole." I started packing up the things I had spent so much time making perfect.

She made her way over to me and stood on the blanket, preventing me from continuing to pack up.

   I rolled my eyes and pulled out my phone to call my mom.

   Ariana snatched my phone and quickly hung up before the first ring.

   "What the fuck do you want Ariana? I'm not playing this stupid game with you. I'm over it. Can't I just be happy? Jesus fuck."

   "I want you to be happy, idiot. I'm right here, trying to make you happy."

   "Crashing my date to tell me that the girl I genuinely like was using me, that's how you think you're going to make me happy?"

   "It's not working?"

   "Does it look like it's working?"

   No response.

   "Just give me my phone." I held out my hand.

   "Why do you need it?"

   "I have to call my mom to come pick me up. It's my phone; I really don't need to explain myself to you."

   "I'll give you a ride home."

   "I would literally rather walk home and risk getting attacked by a coyote."

   She laughed and sat. "I forgot how funny you were."

   "It wasn't a joke."

   She patted the ground beside her.

   I rolled my eyes and reluctantly sat down, well aware that I didn't have much of a choice.

   "Oh come on, move a little closer. It's not like I bite- unless you want me to," she winked, only irritating me further.

   "If I wanted to get bit, I have plenty of options. I'm positive I could walk for 5 minutes and find one of those coyotes more than willing. Besides, I don't let my captors seduce me."

   "You think I'm trying to seduce you."

   "Attempting to. Rather poorly, might I add."

   "Wait- captors?"

   "Yeah. You're holding me here against my will."

   "Oh." She sound hurt, and we sat in silence.

   It was nice for a second until the guilt hit.

   "I'll take you home then." She quickly stood and began to walk away.

   "Ariana," I sighed and stood behind her. She stopped walking but didn't turn around. "I'm not going to apologize. It's the truth, and your actions have consequences. You can't treat people like they're... like they're something less and still expect them to swoon for you."

   "That's how you see me?"

   "You just crashed my date and told me that I was 'quick and easy bait' as I believe you put it."

   She finally turned around to look at me, but still didn't say anything.

   I couldn't look at her. She had so much hurt on her face, but I was still so upset with her. Even just looking at her gave me a headache from all of the overlapping feelings, so my eyes lingered on the rather interesting pebble beside my foot. Her stare was heavy, though. It never left me.

   She sighed and walked towards me. "You drive me crazy." She kissed my forehead and sat back down, grabbing my hand to gently tug me down beside her. "We don't want all of your hard work to go to waste."