The In-Between

Chapter 7 - Blame

"It's just shimmering, Lottie." I said quietly, picking up a small sandwich from the platter. "Please join us."

Calden observed me carefully, his eyes narrowing slightly.

"My apologies, Lady Adelaide, I must return to the kitchen to begin dinner." She said before scurrying out of the room.

When Lottie was gone, Calden said, "Do not involve Lottie in your games, Adelaide."

His voice was stern, angry even. I quirked a brow at him. Did he have feelings for Lottie? She was certainly pretty, but-

"You forget that I know you. I know how you manipulate people. I'll answer whatever questions you have, but Lottie was my mother's favorite handmaiden, and I will not let you hurt her. I know you'll involve Colin in them, you already have-"

I laughed at how irritated his tone became when he alluded to what had conspired between Colin and I earlier. "I see Colin shares everything through that little blood oath." Calden glared at me harder. "I have no interest in Colin."

"It didn't seem that way to him."

"To him? Or to you Calden?" I asked, leaning forward in my chair. "Jealous?"

His jaw twitched. "Hardly."

"Are you sure about that, Calden?" I purred.

Calden's hands tightened on the arms of his chair. "Adelaide." He warned.

I was tired of being warned. I was tired of being told what to do. When would I get what I want?

Calden cocked his head to the side, suddenly. "What do you want?"

I froze, my gaze narrowing on him. "What?"

"You asked when you would get what you want. What do you want?"

I hadn't asked that aloud. I had thought that.  "Reading people's minds is intrusive, Calden, I'm sure Colin's thoughts are far more pleasant."

Calden's brows knitted in confusion. "What are you talking about? You said it out loud."

"No, I did not." I said, through gritted teeth.

"Adelaide, I do not possess the power you're accusing me of with anyone other than Colin. I can assure you that if I heard you say it, then you said it out loud."

I shook my head. I was losing my mind. Being here was making me lose my mind. I looked back at Calden, who had paled slightly, but did not look away. Perhaps he was waiting for me to lunge at him. He was looking at me like he knew me...knew my every thought, but I had changed...his actions had changed me.

I seethed. "You know nothing about me, Calden. Not anymore." A flicker of what looked like pain flitted across his features, only to be hidden by a façade of indifference. "Whose idea was it for you to marry me?"

He stilled. "What?"

"Don't be daft, Calden. You told me you'd answer my questions. Was it your idea to bring me here or your councilors'?"

"Both." Calden relented. "We have been meeting about an uprising in the south for the past few months, monitoring the situation. I received your...request during one of our meetings."

"An uprising? Which courts?" I asked, but the look I received told me that there was more to Calden's story. I waved him to continue as I grabbed another sandwich.

"There were some councilors who did want to send you somewhere like Tagendare, I'm sure you'll be happy to know. Another wanted to bring you here to see how desperate you really were. It was Colin who suggested offering an alliance in order to prepare our courts for a possible invasion from the south. I sent him to your court to see how it was faring. Imagine my surprise when Colin reports he saw you mopping the floors of a restaurant and the next day helping build a cottage on the outskirts of your city. Lady Adelaide of Rivendall helping someone other than herself." Calden chuckled to himself.

I didn't respond. He could have his jabs, pretend to himself that he knew who I was. What I'd become after the war. I could let him pretend if the price was information.

"Colin returned to the council with information about your court, it's structure, but also about your role in it...You're never more dangerous than when you're left to your own devices, Adelaide. You could ruin worlds if you desired."

I rolled my eyes.

"Whether you believe it or not is not my problem." Calden continued. "I knew you would not help us unless we gave you something you wanted in return. In marrying me, Adelaide, you and your court gain more power than you can imagine. It opens every alliance and resource you desire. I know the thought of marrying me is...revolting to you, and I can't blame you for that, but we need you right now. Celestia needs you."

Blame. There was that word again. It was such a confusing word because it insinuated that he thought I did not take responsibility in my part of the war. That I didn't spend hours in a war room deep in the southern courts. That I didn't walk across battlefields destroying fleets of soldiers. But what did I want him to use instead? Forgiveness? I did not want that. I did not need his forgiveness. Punishment? Only if it was death.

I clucked my tongue. "I sided against you in the war, Calden, did you forget that?"

"I did not, but marrying you means that if you side with the south the sentence is death. I cannot afford for you to be on their side...Of course, when I extended this marriage offer, I did not expect that you were...hoping for death."

"How can I believe anything you say?"

Now he was angry. "Open your eyes, Adelaide. You were wrong! Can't you see? My father never wanted to enslave commoners. We never wanted to give the higher nobility more power than they had.  We didn't want to steal resources from the southern region. We were trying to stop- " Calden caught himself.

I gritted my teeth. Was he suggesting that it was Ollie and his family who had wanted to enslave an entire class of people?

"If we wanted to enslave anyone, don't you think we would have started with you. Your court. We destroyed Windguard because they started the uprising. You were on the wrong side back then, and I will not let you make the same mistake again."

My cheeks flared red with anger. He would not let me make the same mistake. Who did he think he was? "I will not listen to you soil Windguard's name."

"They did it to themselves!" He shouted at me. "You've always been so blind when it comes to him, Adelaide. He could never do anything wrong, but he treated you like shit."

Brief images flashed in my head so quickly, I didn't know what to make of them. Like a vault had been unlocked in my mind. Someone covered in bruises. Ollie looking savagely angry.

I didn't miss Calden's flinch as stood up from my chair so quickly that it almost fell over. "Jealousy is not becoming of you, Calden."

"Jealous?" He spat. "Is that what you think this all is about? You've brought it up three times now, so clearly you believe it to some extent. I am not jealous of that piece of filth. How could I be? You think so highly of yourself, Adelaide. I had to have wanted Ollie dead because he had you, right? That's what you think?" He paused to gauge my reaction, but I didn't move.

Internally, I was confused. That was not what I had meant, but I wouldn't let him know that. I thought he was jealous of Ollie because Ollie was a good leader. A figure people gathered behind. After his and my parents died, the rebel forces looked to him for guidance. He was their King, their true King. Here Calden was thinking I thought he was jealous because Ollie had me? I only waited for him to continue.

"He deserved to die that day, Adelaide. He and his father killed hundreds of people in Bostonia and blamed my family."

I gaped at him. That was what had started the war. A series of explosions across the southern court of Bostonia. Hundreds was an understatement, there were thousands of people in that court. Their council had refused to sign King Davyn's trade agreement with courts in the eastern region. The trade agreement promised fabrics and horses from southern region in exchange for goods from crops that could only grow along the eastern edge of the continent. Bostonia claimed that they thought the agreement was unfair...that King Davyn was a tyrant who favored the eastern courts. A day after the Bostonian council refused to sign the agreement, explosions went off under every official building and every landmark. Their entire court, reduced to dust and debris. No one had survived.