Ghosts Of The Past [BoyxBoy] ✓

23. Into The Night

"Where are you going?" Aron gets out of the car. 

"Away from you!" I scream. 

He follows me as I struggle through the greenery. 

"Just get in the car, Olive—"

"Don't fucking call me that right now." 

Aron begins to laugh quietly. 

He's seriously laughing right now? I walk faster. So fast, I don't see the prickly bush that cuts into my skin. 

"Fuck!" I exclaim. 

Aron rushes to me and grabs my arm. 

"Are you okay? What happened?" Aron asks, worried as he looks at the cut. 

"What do you think? Whatever, let go of me!" I yank my arm out of Aron's hold and move to walk away but he grabs me again. 

"Come on, there's a first aid kit in the car." Aron pulls me towards the car but I struggle with all my power. 

"Stop telling me what to do!" 

"Someone has to. Now, come on!" Aron pulls harder so I struggle more. 

"You know what? Fine." Aron lets go of me and I'm just about ready to leave when he picks me up and carries me back.

"What are you doing?! Let me go!" I fight hard to get out of his tight grasp without much success.

He pushes me against the car and starts tending to my wound. 

"Ow!" I moan. It's deeper than I thought. 

"Told you you needed help."

"If you'd let me drive none of this would have happened." 

Aron doesn't respond. 

When he's done he kisses the wound over the bandage.

I roll my eyes. 

"Oh come on! Are you still mad at me?" His eyes plead for forgiveness. 

I try to keep myself from melting. 

I look away. 

"Are you gonna let me drive?" I ask, crossing my arms. 

After a while of staring at the sky I look back at Aron. His jaw is clenched in frustration. 

"Wow." I say, moving to walk past him. 

He stops me. 

"Fine."

We're back in the car and I'm driving now. Aron's wide awake, though. Watching the road cautiously. 

"You're such a control freak, Aron."

"What?"

"Look at you, you can't even relax even though you just drove for ten hours."

"I'm not a control freak." 

"Oh no? You never let me drive, you're always worried about me. You basically don't leave me alone for more than five minutes because you're scared something bad is gonna happen—"

"And why do you think that is?" Aron asks quietly, eyes on the road. He clenches his jaw.

Sofía. His sister. Of course.. why didn't I think about that? I'm so stupid.

I grab his hand. 

"Aron, I get it. But you don't have to worry about me. I'm not Sofía. You don't have to save me."

"You tried to k—" He heaves and looks away. 

I pull over. 

"Hey,"

I turn his head to me. His eyes are puddles of water and he looks so scared. So broken.

It hurts me to see him like this. 

I caress his cheek. 

"I would never try that again." I look into his eyes. 

"You don't know that." A tear rolls down his cheek. 

"I do. I've been happier with you these past two months than I've been all my life. I would never do anything to stop that."

He nods and leans his head against mine. 

"You need to stop thinking that as long as you're in control nothing bad can happen because that's just not true. You just saw that... You have to trust me."

Aron nods again. 

He kisses me and pulls me into a tight hug. 

***

I've been driving for two hours now and Aron's finally let go and fallen asleep. He looks adorable. His cheeks are flushed and he looks kind of happy. And so harmless.. like a baby. He usually looks sort of dangerous or intimidating but asleep he looks completely innocent. I find myself running my fingers through his perfect curls. 

"Hmm.." He smiles in his sleep. 

I laugh a little. 

He's completely precious. 

Another hour later, Aron's still asleep and I drive through the dark night. We're getting closer. We've officially left California and we're headed straight for Alabama. I took the top down and the cold night air is blowing through my hair. There aren't many other cars on the road with us. I enjoy the quiet. The sound of the wind, the sound of Aron's peaceful breathing. The crickets. And I feel fine. I feel happy. And I wonder if maybe I should turn around and go home. Like Aron should have done that night after his sister's suicide. I wonder if I should make a U-turn and enjoy life as it is. Because I might be making things worse by doing this. I might be ruining something that wasn't so bad to begin with. 

But then I look next to me at my boyfriend, who I haven't been able to be intimate with because of Neil. Because of my past. And how I'll always be stuck where I am now if I don't do something. Maybe now isn't so bad.. but it isn't good either. It isn't living. I'm half alive. Constantly stuck between the present and the past. And it's suffocating. And it's infuriating. 

I want Aron. I want him completely. I want his body.. not just his mind. And I refuse to let some old pervert take that away from me. I refuse to sit quietly while that guy still controls me after all this time. He has to know what he did. He has to get out of my system. I grow impatient. Hungry, for an end to this hell. 

So I kick the pedal and drive, full speed, into the night.