Faryah

58

I really believed he could find peace, it was just time we needed and Allah's guidance.

He was definitely going to help us.

" Hey" I heard Khalid call as I heard him sit in the chair in front of me. It's been an hour and I was still doing some paperwork. I needed to stretch. " Hi" I answered without taking my eyes off my laptop.

" I'm sorry for earlier" he started and I looked at him. " it's fine" I answered and looked back at my laptop. " She's adorable, she's just like me, I wanted to let her watch more of her cartoons so here I am"

" cool" I answered as I typed more. I could honestly feel his eyes on me.

"We would have been the perfect family you know" He started. " But we couldn't be"

" I'm so sorry Faryah" He said and I sighed and looked at him, keeping my laptop aside. " Khalid, it's all in the past now, let's just forgive each other and let things slide and just move on"

" Forgive me then, I'm honestly never going to stop begging you for your forgiveness, please forgive me Faryah, for everything, for every pain I caused you, I honestly really just want to live a peaceful life and forget about all the rubbish I did and the mess I turned myself into while you were away, I can't find peace if I can't have you Faryah"

" Khalid, trust me you can, that is why you have Allah" I said and looked at him. He was teary eyed. " Khalid, there is one person in this life who will never stop loving you no matter, no matter the sins you commit, he's always there, he's always there waiting for you to repent genuinely and he will forgive you, he is the most merciful, he's Allah" I said and watched as he tried avoiding my gaze. " Khalid honestly, I know you went through a devastating childhood with your mother and I know that you definitely do not want to be like your Father"

" I almost turned into him, I hit you" he answered. " but it was out of anger, you let Shaytan control you and it's not supposed to be so, Khalid you're a good person and that anger in you, the aggressive part of you needs to die down, the only way we can get rid of that is by praying to Allah, just make Salah, stay a while in your sujood, pour your heart out to him and that's it, you'll be fine, you'll find peace because Allah is always there to listen to you, he is always there to protect and guide you, he loves all his servants equally Khalid"

" If he really did love all his servants, why would he want to see us go through immense pain"

" To test your faith, Khalid, everyday Allah tests his servants with different obstacles and them overcoming makes them be stronger in faith, it makes them believe that Allah is the greatest and with him anything can happen" I said and watched him sigh and look at me.

" So the pain and agony me and my mother went through was all just a test?" He asked and I nodded. " Yes, don't you ever wonder how you were made, not the biological way"

" no"

" well Allah made me, he gave you that soul that's inside you, he's the one that placed you in your mother's womb for nine months, don't you think he deserves all the praises?, no body is like him, he's the one and only God and to him we shall return, he gave us life, why won't we worship him?" I asked and watched him stare at me intently.

" Yeah, Mother said all that" He answered and sighed. " I don't know what to do now honestly" he said and I sighed and got up from my seat. He was still my husband so placing a caring hand on his shoulder wasn't a bad idea. He needed it and I was more than willing to do anything for him to be on the right path.