You and My World (are one in the same)

My Ground

I have a love of falling, there's something addicting about catching air.

My first love was a trampoline, and he provided me with all the thrill of a fall with all the rush of a jump. My mom used to say I was an angel, desperate to return to the clouds. I was always reaching, always falling, never disappointed to hit the ground. I always just got back up. I was innocent.

I've learned now, that there's something addicting about innocence, too.

Naturally, my second love was a rollercoaster, and he was the bad boy. He made me love speed, and satisfied my need to rush into things. He introduced me to a new kind of falling, a falling where I felt made of adrenaline and laughter and the sky. This was not an innocent love. This was a desperate one.

I thought nothing else could make me feel like that. Nothing else could make my heart beat that fast, and my stomach turn and make my face red with joy and magic. Nothing else could possibly make me fly like that.

Then, there was you.

I can't get over the sanctity of you. You are a heaven on earth, who bleeds the fountain of youth and sings love. I fear your heights as I have never feared anything else. I fear the way you make me want you more than my innocence.

You are the kind of fall I never prepared for. You are the ground. I could only dream of someone like you when I was that young girl reaching for the sky. I could only imagine your eyes as stars, your hands as wind. When I move with you it is ethereal.

And yet, I've never been so scared in my life as of now; our wedding day, minutes before I walk the aisle.
I look like a cloud, you look like a dream, and I can't move, I can't make a step. It's like if I let myself do this, if I let myself walk instead of fly, you will know that I have never loved any thrill more than you. You will know my excitement is yours, and you will know that we are something I just can't rush. We are more.

You see, trampolines wore me out after a while, and rollercoasters ended, because they weren't forever like this will be. They weren't the world.

I fear letting you know that you are the world. Even though you'd never let it get to your head. It's simply what it would mean: there's nothing more addicting than you. Nothing I can love more. For the first time I am disappointed I hit the ground. I am cautious and mature, because the fall with you was powerful. It's been everything.

And, God, I'm nervous, but I'm not going anywhere.
You cure me of my addiction, you make me want to walk.