MAE DAY (Book 1 COMPLETE) (Book 2 in progress on Wattpad)

Chapter 19 - MAE DAY

"How long have they been down?" she asked referring to the twins.

I shrugged.

"Well I'll keep my ear out for them and little Suri. It's so good to have her back and you here," she said and handed me a scarf to put around my neck. "The helicopter is cold," she said helping me do it up and buttoning up my coat. "I will make you something to eat as soon you come home," she said making me realise 'home' meant here. I allowed myself to glow a little at the thought.

I had never been on a helicopter and the memories of the twins going in them from hospital to hospital was something I wish I could forget. That call saying my sister and her husband and had been hit by a lorry whose brakes failed still haunts me. They were walking back to the car from the rest break at the services and bang gone. Glenn was dead on impact having thrown himself in front of my sister and she was wedged between the wheel of the lorry and their car. She never regained consciousness and they barely had time to get the twins out before she died. They were on their way to see me as a surprise. She wanted to show me the wedding pictures and video, she kept saying 'I want to see your face' now I know she meant she wanted to see my face when I saw Lee. I tried to remember what my thoughts or expression had been the first time I met him but I couldn't. I was too tired and even back then I was on autopilot waiting on the babies to die as the doctors said they were too small. If Glenn's body hadn't been in the way the twin's would have died and my sister wouldn't have been able to hold on long enough to let the doctors cut them out.

I realised I was still trying to hold on to my old life. Like I was babysitting and expecting them to walk through the door and say 'sorry we've been so long' and take the twins so I can get back to normal. I knew now it was never going to happen. Watching my sister so full of life on her wedding day, she would have called me by now, she would have turned up to see me and insist on going out to dinner so she could drink virgin cocktails and pretend to get drunk. Glenn would arrive with Lee and she would smile like the cat that got the cream. I would give her the thumbs up as obviously Lee is gorgeous and no doubt we would have gossiped in the toilets about him and set me up on another date where I would tell text her to say things were going well or that he had dropped me home and we had kissed.

Instead he is lying in hospital fighting for his life, I am pregnant with his child from sex I don't remember, my sister and husband are dead, I have Lee's daughter as he is engaged to Glenn's ex and I have my sisters babies... life sucks double balls. I want my sister back!

I felt an arm around me and realised I was in my own world and had turned into a tear soaked mess. Carla gave me a hug.

"I feel so alone, I just want her back," I sobbed.

"You are not alone, we are here for you," she said cuddling me. I let myself pretend it was my sister again and hugged her tight. "If you and Lee get married he will be your husband, you will be his wife, you'll never alone again. Plus you have this little one to add to the three children you have already. You'll have his companionship and love. You will be a couple and attend parties together, even throw them and go on holidays as a family."

I felt better picturing the things she described but wasn't confident that Lee and I were meant for each other and forcing it would ruin our friendship.

"Stop worrying about how you feel about each other as this is the start of your relationship. A relationship that is already a friendship and you trust each other. How can that be bad. If I were in your shoes you would be telling me to go get Bowdie and if your sister was here she would be telling you to go get him too. So you go rescue that man from Stephanie's clutches because as soon as he is no longer obliged to marry her I am going to kill her," Carla whispered. "And believe me it will be my pleasure."