Sweet but Sour [HS]

1.

April 2018

God! Why do I always feel this way? Why do I always feel jealous of all the other girls my age? I just want a perfect body, a perfect life! I wish I could have everything they had, but no I'm just boring old Avery Thompson from California.

I quickly grab my pen and notebook from my desk and throw it on my bed. I look around for my guitar and I find it under a dirty pile of clothes. Geez I really need to clean up.

I sit on my bed and start playing around with chords hoping to find something. When I do the lyrics start coming easily to me.

"I kinda wanna throw my phone across the room, 'Cause all I see are girls too good to be true" It's true, everywhere I look I see girls who seem to have a perfect life. "With paper-white teeth and perfect bodies, wish I didn't care" I wish I didn't care about these girls who look better than me, but I do.

"I know their beauty's not my lack, but it feels like that weight is on my back, and I can't let it go" I constantly feel like I have to live up to these standards they're posting online even though I know I don't have to.

"Com-comparison is killin' me slowly, I think I think too much, 'bout kids who don't know me" The persona I put online is constantly being judged by people who don't even know me. "I'm so sick of myself, I'd rather be, rather be, anyone, anyone else" God how I wish I could just be someone else. "My jealousy, jealousy started followin' me, started followin' me" I'm so jealous of all these girls and how I wish I could just be like them.

I stop there knowing I can write the rest of the verses later. I place my guitar down next to me and finish writing down what I need to in my notebook. I still feel riled up, so I need something to calm me down. Writing a song isn't going to help me with that as it will make my emotion more extreme. I remember the one thing that always calms me down from whatever emotion I'm feeling.

Music.

I pick up my phone from its place next to me and open my music app. I scroll through my added albums till I come across one album. Harry Styles. It's a short album but it's a good one. I press play and Meet Me in the Hallway starts playing. I immediately remember how amazing this album is as a whole. They lyrics, the melodies, absolutely everything about this album is pure perfection. I could stay here and relish in how amazing it is forever, but I don't have forever.

A random spontaneous thought pops into my head. I run over to my desk where my laptop is sitting. I sit down and immediately open up my browser. "Harry Styles Los Angeles concert tickets" is what I quickly type into the browser.

Many different links come up, but I click the first one. I don't really care where I sit, I just wanna go. I click randomly on a ticket, not even checking what the price is, and start typing in my details. I press purchase and just like that it's done. I'm seeing Harry Styles in the flesh on July 13th at the Forum. I click on the map that tells me where I'm going to be seated, I'm right in front of the B stage. This should be interesting; B stages always have some of the best songs.

I lean back in my chair and realise what I just did. I just bought floor tickets for a Harry Styles concert, and I don't regret it. I've been too so many concerts over the years, but I think this one is going to be one of the best.

Carolina starts playing and I decide that it's time to get up and dance, after all this is a song that anyone can dance to. The upbeat tempo just makes you feel alive and the girl he wrote it about must feel lucky she got one of the best songs on the album written about her.

I wonder what he is going to wear. I think from what I've heard he wears a different outfit to each show. That must be a lot of outfits in the closet. Oh well, he looks good in everything. He is Harry Styles after all. I think personally he should wear a purple suit because I think he'd look good in purple, but then again, I think blue is more his colour. Oh my god, Sign of the Times live will be an experience. I watched his performance of it on Graham Norton a while ago and his vocals were incredible so I could only imagine how amazing they'd be on tour. It's going to be like getting sent to heaven I reckon.

I hear the familiar tune of my ringtone and it snaps me out of my thoughts. I rush over to my phone and see the familiar name of the person who usually calls me. "hey mum!!" I say as soon as I pressed answer. My mum is like my superhero. She's always been there for me no matter what. "Hey Lemon! I'm sorry dad and I weren't able to celebrate your 21st with you last month, we wanted to make it up to you by coming over tomorrow, if that is okay with you of course." She speaks. My dad was on a business trip pretty much all of March which means they missed my birthday. I was sad about it, but I was grateful I had my friends Presley and Victoria there. They're my ride or dies till the end and I'll be forever grateful of the friendship I have with them.

"Mum it's fine that you missed it, I still had Presley and Vic. I would love to see you; however, I feel like dad is always on a business trip these days" I love my dad but growing up it was mainly my mum and I as my dad was off travelling the world on his business trips. He always wanted to take us, but I had school and friends and I wasn't old enough to stay home alone for a few weeks. Now that I've moved out mum usually joins him on his trips and, even though I'd love to, I can't join them as I have a job here and I also have friends that I see very often.

"Yea we can't help it though, well I'll see you tomorrow, around lunch you reckon?" She answers. I smile, I love seeing my family, they're the only constant in my life and I value them so much. "Sounds great! I'll cook us something absolutely delicious, I'm sure you and dad will love it!" I reply. I hear my mum chuckle over the phone. I don't cook a lot, even though I live alone. I usually get some form of take out. "Can't wait to see what it is lemon, talk later, I love you".

"I love you too mum, see you tomorrow" I state back. I hang up the phone and my music starts blaring through my phone, I forgot I was even playing that. I turn it down quickly out of fright. Sweet Creature is playing, and this song is beautiful. I lay down and close my eyes to soak in the music.

The vocals, the lyrics, the melodies, as a songwriter I love it. As a fan I love it even more.

God I can't wait to see this man in his element.

//

Hey! So this was kind of short but I didn't know what else to write. I'll try to make the other chapters longer!

I was supposed to see harry in November 2020 but you know... COVID.

Anyways I hope you enjoyed this chapter hehe :)

stay safe and I love you!!