Too Far Apart

21. Much Resolved

"I have to go." he picked himself up, gave Wangji a courtesy, gave a small glare to Wei Wuxian, then he left. He didn't even pay heed to Wei Wuxian's hopeless tone as it faded behind him, "I wanted to thank him for the marriage talk with Master Lan."

Thank yous and sorries will be the death of this guy some day, he thought as he closed his room door. He tried to collect himself but failed again and again. One thought rang through his mind like a clarity bell and drowned him like empathy. He wasn't replaced. Lan Xichen never knew of his feelings to begin with.

All those times, he had thought Lan Xichen knew of his returned interests, then he began to think that he didn't care. He submitted to the fact that the ribbon held no meaning to Lan Xichen and the crown had been too loud an announcement to a man who didn't feel the same about him. When Lan Huan had confessed to him he had been angry and heartbroken, thinking, 'so, the ribbon did have a meaning. He was interested but why did I get replaced so quickly?' 

He had always thought that Lan Xichen didn't feel as he did to begin with, which is why he was so easily replaced. But now, knowing Meng Yao saw the gift important enough to be stolen, to drive this gap between them, meant that there was something. Something more. What now? He had driven the very man he desperately wanted far away.

"Aaaah! What do I do now?" Zidan sparked.

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"ZeWu Jun." Lan Xichen's steps halted as he heard Master Wei from a distance. He turned to look at the endearing sight of his brother and Master Wei coming to him. A moment of jealousy passed in his heart before he told himself that he had no right to feel this way. Wangji had gotten a happy ending after going through the pain of dealing with death. He didn't. Because he was dense even when the one he loved was right before his eyes all through the years.

"ZeWu Jun." Master Wei bowed again and his brother addressed, "Brother."

"Wang..." his words were struck in his throat as his brother produced a familiar box from his lapels. He felt his body drain for some reason. He should be happy. But.. But he was anxious. When he reached out to take it, he could tell that his brother and Master Wei had seen his hands tremble.

"How? What?" He took a moment to compose himself into coherency but Master Wei had already began.

"I am really curious as to who gave ZeWu Jun a gift that is so precious to him. So very precious that.. It was.. Stolen by him." ZeWu Jun closed his eyes. He was grateful for people trying not to speak Jin Guangyao's name in front of him, but he wished people would stop doing that.

"Wanyin gave it to me." hearing no response for a while, he opened his eyes to watch the stunned expression of both his brother and his brother's partner. Master Wei was the first to recover.

"How long has this been going on? Why didn't I know of this?"

"Wanyin gave this to me around the beginning of Sunshot campaign."

"All those years ago?"

"Brother." he shifted his attention to Wangji who seemed to have finally recovered.

"Sect Leader Jiang is in Caiyi town."

He is here but did not come to see him? Is Wanyin that unwilling to see him? What could he do? He knew he didn't want to look the other way after knowing what he knew. He stroked the beautiful carvings on the box wanting to open it. It was too intimate to be opened out in the middle of people.

"Brother Xichen." he looked up in surprise at Master Wei's address. Instead of saying anything, he laughed, "I knew it."

"Brother. Go to Caiyi town. I will place this in your room." Wangji extended his hand and Xichen placed the box there, hesitant to part with it knowing what happened the last time he parted with it. Then he climbed Shuoyue, leaving no thoughts in his mind.