ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ 17

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YOU WOULD THINK THAT after two months living in this mansion and having dinner every night together as a 'family' would make everything less weird

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YOU WOULD THINK THAT after two months living in this mansion and having dinner every night together as a 'family' would make everything less weird.

But it seems like that's not the case.

It's Friday and we are all sitting in this huge table eating, but today the air seems more tense. It feels like they are hiding something, I know their big secret, but there is something else.

I feel suffocated, it's pissing me off how they think I'm so naive and won't notice how they have secrets. It pisses me even more the fact that they probably think that just because I'm girl, I won't be able to survive their life style.

Being a girl is tough, but not because of the reasons they think it is. It's not tough because we are weaker, which we aren't. It's tough because of the judgement we receive everyday.

If you don't have an ass, you are flat. If you do have, you can't show because people will call you a 'slut' or a 'hoe'.

If you are flat chested, you need biger boobs. But if you do, don't bring attention to them, or you'll be called a 'slut' or a 'hoe' again.

If you are too short, be taller. But if you are too tall, it's weird.

If you are too skiny, you are anorexic. But if you are too 'fat' you need to lose weight, because in society 'fat' girls are mistreated and considered 'ugly'. Which is not true.

If we don't send nudes, boys get mad. But if we do, boys use them against us or we get exposed and labeled.

We can't go out at night without the constant fear that something is going to happen. That someone is going to approuch us and do something without our consent. One in 9 girls experience sexual abuse or assault at the hands of an adult.

And guys and other people wonder why girls are insecure. People jugde us, and put others down. We have to live in a society that isn't fair, and at the end of the day some girls hate themselves because society has taught them to.

I've been a girl my whole life, so being on their line of work is easy compered to what girls have to go throught everyday.

They think they are protecting me, but congratulations, now you have a daughter/sister that lies to you because she doesn't trust you enough. Someone that never opens up, that have anxiety and depression but won't ever tell you because that's what you taugh her, you taught her to lie.

And right now, this silence and tense air is pissing me off.

"I know y'all are hiding something, and I'm not asking for you to tell me. But this dinner is soffocating me, so I'm going to my room." I say and start to get up. No one replied, but before I could go I heard something that made me even more angry.

"We are not the only ones that have secrets, so don't act like like you are a saint when in reality you are a bitch." says Lorenzo.

"Yes, you are right. You are not the only ones. Everyone has secrets, but how am I supposed to trust you enogh and tell you my secrets if you don't trust me enough to tell yours? And being a bitch is a tough job, but someone's gotta do it." I say back to him.

"Whatever." he replied rolling his eyes.

"Keep rolling your eyes and maybe you'll find your brain back there."

"At least I have one."

"Awww... am I supposed to cry because you are insulting my intelligence?" I say pretending to pout. "I've been called and told worse, so you'll have to try harder sweetie."

Everyone stopped eating and now their attention was on me and Lorenzo.

"I doubt you've been called worse since you had a perfect life. I bet the worse you had was not receiving the clothes or cars you wanted for your birthday. We should have never let you live here." he replied.

I usually don't care what people say about me. Not anymore at least. But he crossed the line now.

I always had let him say rude things and be an asshole because I knew he was angry at the world and not me. And I know that behind anger there is fear and hurt.

So I never complained, I may had replied to some of the insults, but never let them faze me.

But now, he assumed what my life was like before. And he was totally wrong.

"It's funny how the people that least know you act like they've known you for your whole life. You think I had a perfect life when in reality the only time I had real parents they were taken away from me because of some drunk dude that decided to drive at the same time my parents did." I say as tears form in my eyes but I don't release them. I can't give him the satisfaction of seeing how deep his words hurts.

My breathing was unstable and my hands started to shake. Rage was the only thing I could feel in this moment.

"You think that after that was easy? But let me tell you something, the others five foster homes that I lived didn't give two shits about me. I had to provide food for myself when I was 10 years old!" I yelled at him containing my self from punching him on the face.

"Then there was my last foster home before they found out about you all, I had to live in that hell hole for a year with the monster that you know as my foster dad. The person that hunts my dreams even after he is fucking dead!" I continue.

A humorless laugh escaped my lips as flashbacks from when I lived with John play on my mind like a movie.

"And if you didn't want me here, why did you say 'yes' when the officers called. It was your choice not mine. And about that why would you take me in after leaving me at the orphanage door with only a letter. I was two years old! What did I do that made you leave me there alone?!" I say looking at them.

Lorenzo held so much regret in his eyes, but nothing would change the hurt he made me feel in this exact moment.

The others had shocked faces, some even had tears in their eyes.

Brittany and Ashley were just sitting there without a care about what just happened.

This was too much, I couldn't stay there any longer. I took my phone and ran to the front door. I passed the gates and the guards and let my feet take me wherever the hell they wanted.

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Hope you liked it!

Love y'all <3

XOXO

XOXO

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