14: In Between the Lines

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On Monday, Avery went to therapy. It was awkward and strange at first, but Dr. Hopkins was very nice and encouraging.

"You've lost a lot, Avery," she had said. "But I hope you realize what you've gained along the way."

It had stuck with Avery, as she walked back to her room it was all she could think about. What were the good things in her life? Did they really outweigh the bad? Avery went back to her dorm and pulled out a sheet of paper. She grabbed a pen and began to write:

Uncle Mark

Emmet

Nikki

Archer

Cole

Brady

Avery frowned. There was another name that came to mind, but she thought better of it. The door to her room opened and Avery quickly shoved the paper in her textbook. She pulled out some other homework as Julian and Nikki came in.

She and Julian weren't talking, other than the occasional time they caught the other glaring, their interactions were limited. That made things quite awkward considering he and Nikki were still dating. Or whatever you called what the two of them were doing. Avery had yet to see the two of them go out on a date or kiss for that matter. Maybe it was a privacy thing, she wasn't sure. She just thought it was strange.

"Want to come into town with us?" Nikki asked. "Cole, Julian, and I are going to the mall to meet Emmet."

Avery glanced over at Nikki, she seemed oblivious to the tension between Avery and Julian.

"I'm good," she said before turning back to her desk.

"Please?" she asked. "Come on, you can invite Archer and we can all go have fun."

"Seriously Nikki, I'm fine," Avery said a little forcefully this time.

Nikki frowned. Obviously, she had gotten the message. She sighed and turned back to Julian.

"Let me get changed and then we can go."

Julian sat on the couch while he waited for Nikki. Avery felt his eyes on her. Avery pulled out some homework and began doing that instead. Anything to distract her from the awkwardness in the room.

"I saw you in Dr. Hopkins office today," he said quietly.

Avery turned around immediately. "What were you doing there?"

He shrugged. "I'm seeing her too now."

They stared at each other for a moment. "I don't think it helps," Avery muttered.

"Well, I suppose it's better than punching a guy you don't like," he said.

Avery stared at him, his eye was still slightly purple from his fight with Archer.

"That was a joke, Davidson."

"Ha-ha," she said dryly.

Nikki then came back out and she and Julian left. Avery sighed as she watched the door close. Her thoughts drifted back to the list she had made. What was the point? Even if she had those people in her life now, would it not change in a few years? Did people not leave? Who was she kidding? People left all the time, of their own will or not, all people left. Her father had left her due to untreatable cancer, her mother had left her for some unknown reason, and the list went on and on. The people Avery knew from before her and her father's spontaneous road trip were just a distant memory. Besides, they had all known a different Avery, a girl who smiled and laughed with ease, one who spent her days in the aquarium petting the stingrays and running to the shark tank with Julian. Certainly not the girl who had purple eyebags from untreatable insomnia and had serious abandonment issues.

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