You Weren't There

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I breath heavily, trying to catch my breath from the effort and stand in silence as I look to Okoye. Yep, just how it started, still out of breath. I should really work on getting better cardio.
It had been some time since I started training in Wakanda, and she had taken it upon herself to test my abilities often. Since I had been here, my ice shards had gotten stronger and sharper, and my shield had gotten thicker, so it was able to withstand more. They had also enabled me to learn more on creating ice I could walk on while not on the ground – a feat I had only ever done that once on the bridge where we first met the Winter Soldier. It was still a work in progress, but every day I got stronger and faster and better. When I wasn’t training, I was in the lab with Nikia, being her assistant for anything and everything that she needed. For all my book smarts, it was finally coming into play and I felt so useful. It was such a relief.
“You have come a long way since you first came here.” She compliments me. I take one more big breath, and respond, “It is truly an honor, thank you.” As she lets the quiet fall back in between us, she looks at me as if trying to decide if she should say what she is about to.
“It is happening tonight.” She says in a low voice so that only I can hear, even though there is no one else around. I know exactly what she is talking about. Tonight, is the final test for Bucky to see if the words have finally been pulled from his mind.

Nikia brought him out of the stasis what felt like years ago, confident that it had worked. But with a reasonable reason why, T’Challah and the others had been cautious to test it out. They decided to retrain him and resharpen his skills, the good fighting skills, and ensure he was kept in a positive mind state. He stayed in a small cottage at the edge of the city, and had no contact with people outside of those three, to ensure that the worst would not happen.
I remembered being there when he awoke. It was terrifying and exciting all at the same time. I knew that he would remember me, but there was that small part that was afraid he wouldn’t. Or maybe part of me wished he didn't, just to make things easier for him. he was already dealing with enough. Wow, I sound kind of like a cliche martyr. Sorry about that.
Nikia was there, along with T’Challah and Okoye, as well as some extra guards, just in case things went south. When the frost cleared, he slowly pulled himself out of the chamber and looked around, gathering his bearings. I stood towards the back, at a safe distance as requested, and unable to be seen. He looked at all the faces around him, clearly confused. But slowly I could see all the memories coming back to him.
“Has it been long?” he asks to those around him.
“Long enough.” T’Challah answers. Nikia excitedly walks over to him and states, “You will no longer be the Winter Solider. Now, you will be White Wolf.” I smile at this new idea, and then make my decision to see myself out. Bucky has other things to focus on now, as do I. No need to make things more complicated by making my presence known.

“You know he is still not aware of your being here.” She adds, pulling me from my reverie.
“I know. It’s probably safer that way.” I respond.
“Why is it like this? I feel there is something that you have no told us. And secrets make for dangers.” She says, a touch of threatening in her voice.
“I can guarantee it will not bring any danger here. But it is something that cannot be talked about or even thought about right now.” I try to defend. I know that it’s wrong, not telling them anything. But I hadn’t told anyone that Bucky was my soulmate. Love was not important. Not with the way things were in the world. Okoye gives me a small glare but decides not to push me further.
“We are done for today. Go get ready to see Nikia.” With that, she leaves. I let out a small sigh and make my way back to the room the Wakandan’s had provided me in their city.

They were gracious enough to provide me with the essential items that I needed, and I was fortunate enough to be able to receive messages from the team.
The latest message had been from Steve and Wanda. Wanda said that her and Vision were going away, to enjoy themselves. She wouldn’t tell me where, but I knew why; they just wanted to be left alone. I was so happy for her, that she was happy. Steve was just doing his check in, as he did several times over the course of being here. I hadn’t yet replied to him, but at least today would be as good a day as any to do it.
After I wash up from the training ground, I sit down at my desk ready to compose my return digital message, but then hear a small knock on my open door. It is T’Challah to my surprise. He may have worked with all of us in the battle, but he was still a king. I didn’t expect any kind of special treatment or attention from him. He stands silently at the door, observing me, as I meet his gaze back.
“Now, the real work will begin.” He waits for no response from me and walks away.
I take that as my que to go. I change into my everyday clothes and make my way down to the lab to meet with Nikia

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