You and Me

Selfish

The next morning Jessica woke up with a splitting headache. She sat up and looked for her phone. It was sitting on the nightstand and charging. Kelly must of came in after she fell asleep and plugged it in.

This kind gesture brought a smile to her face. She then picked up her phone to see what time it was. It was 7 am. Jessica knew she needed to get up and get moving or she would miss her flight.

She groaned and rolled out of bed. Her bare feet hitting the cold hard floor. She gathered her clothes and her phone and went out to the living room. Kelly was sitting on the couch scrolling though his phone.

When he heard the bedroom door come open he put his phone down and looked over at Jessica. "Morning."

"Morning Kelly."

"How'd you sleep?"

"Not to bad. Got a major headache this morning."

"I bet. You polished off a whole bottle of whisky." Kelly got up from his spot on the couch. He went to the fridge and grabbed a bottle of water. He then opened a cabinet and pulled out some Tylenol.

Kelly then walked over to Jessica and handed her the water and Tylenol. "Thanks." Jessica took the water and Tylenol. She took a couple of the pills and washed it down with water.

"You're welcome."

"Well I should probably get going or else I'll miss my flight home."

Kelly was disappointed. He was hoping she would stay a bit longer. Wanting to talk to her. He wanted to fix things. "Can you get a later flight?"

"I'm sorry Kelly. I don't think that's a good idea." Jessica wanted to stay. She didn't want to go back to New York. Back to her seemingly perfect life.

"And why not?"

"Because if I don't leave now then I'm afraid I'll never leave again."

Kelly hadn't expected her to say that. It caught him off guard. "Then stay. Don't go back."

"I'm sorry Kelly I can't."

Kelly knew he need to do something. If he didn't then she would probably never come back. "Then why do you still have it?"

"Excuse me?" Jessica was confused.

"The tattoo Jess. Our tattoo. I saw it last night when you asked me to unzip your dress."

"It's a reminder of how happy I was and how happy I could be again one day. It serves as a reminder." Jessica bit her lip trying to decide what to say next. "I never stopped loving you Kelly."

Kelly took a step closer to Jessica. "I never stopped loving you either."

Kelly went to hold Jessica's hand but she pulled it back. "But you hurt me. And it's hard to see past that night you broke my heart. You had no emotion on your face. You didn't look sad or upset that you were ending things. Then you just left me sitting there on my porch. Alone and heartbroken."

"Jessica I'm sorry. I thought I was doing the right thing by letting you go."

"No Kelly what you did was entirely selfish. You didn't want to take the chance of having to live with the possibility of me coming home because I missed you too much. You were only thinking about yourself and how you felt. You didn't think about how much breaking my heart would break me."

Kelly was in shock by Jessica's remarks. Was he really being selfish? Was he really in the wrong?

"Goodbye Kelly." Jessica left the cabin. She got in her car and headed back to the hotel to pack. So many voices in her head telling her to stay. So many voices saying New York isn't your home.

She just kept blocking them out the best she could. She began to pack her bags so she could head to the airport.

***

Kelly watched Jessica leave the cabin. He didn't know what to say to her. Was he really being selfish back then? He thought he was making things easier for her. He wanted her to be successful. He didn't want to hold her back.

Kelly took a seat on the couch and called Casey.

"Hey Severide. What's up?"

"I think I truly lost her." Kelly was trying to contain his emotions but his heart was hurting.

"What do you mean?"

"She said she never stopped loving me but she can't get past what I did. How I just left her there heartbroken. How I showed no emotion when I broke things off."

"Kelly I'm sorry man." Casey felt horrible. He knew how much they both cared about each other but maybe they were finally over. "Maybe this is what you both need to move on. To let go."

"But I don't want to let go Casey! She has held my heart since we were teenagers." Kelly couldn't contain his emotions any longer. He started to cry.

"Then fight for her Kelly! Go after her. Don't just give up. Not after all this time."

"But..."

Matt cut Kelly off before he could say another word. "Listen here Severide. You two are the most stubborn people I know. Start over. Win her back. If she truly holds your heart then go fight for her! Now get off that couch and go to the airport and get your girl back."

Something clicked in Kelly's head when Casey was giving his speech. He was right. He needed to do everything he could to win her back. He couldn't just expect her to forgive him right away and they get back together.

"Thank you Casey."

"Anytime man. Now go."

The two men hung up the phone. Kelly grabbed his jacket and ran out of the cabin. He jumped into his car and headed for the Chicago airport.

He was going to do everything in his power to win her back. Even if that meant start from square one. He would date her all over again. Have all new first together. He was not going to give up. Not again.