IN MY HEAD¹ ━━ Bellamy Blake

𝐗𝐋𝐈𝐈: What She's Done

    They move soundlessly through the deserted space. Everything is dipped in shadows. It's almost as  ━━ just barely, if you narrow your eyes just enough ━━ it's almost as if nothing has changed. When Lyra's eyelids flutter shut, she can still hear them, the children roaming through the halls, the neighbors chattering as the circadian lights drift off into twilight, the laughter of young kids, the quiet chastising of their teachers and parents. But now it is nothing more than a hollowed out void.

The dorm is frantic with noise as Octavia frees their people. Lyra ignores them. She bolts from Bellamy's grasp, runs straight into her dads arms, already bursting into noisy tears.

I didn't want anyone to die, she thinks furiously, unable to do anything but splutter incomprehensibly. She didn't. She didn't. She didn't.

Her voice is raw, wretched, and her knees start to buckle. She is warped with despair. Her dad is the one who holds her up, with Noah clutching her so fiercely that she thinks he might break her.

     "It's OK," Noah says immediately, his voice tight with pain. He smooths her hair back and holds her tighter still, his shoulders shaking. "It's OK, you did the right thing, there was no other way out of this — you saved so many lives, you're the hero, Lyra."

     I didn't want this, she thinks, broken. Her tears are still falling. I didn't want any of this. . .

͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙　✩　*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ 　　.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙　✩　*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙

THE RETURN TO Camp Jaha is a blur.

     Abby had stitched Lyra's wound while they were still in the mountain. There was no anesthesia.

Not a single word blooms across Lyra's lips as they begin the death march back. Her dad did not stay standing long after their conversation ━━ after Clarke had killed Dante, Cage went to put Abby on the table. Raven had protested, taking a beating, and then her dad had apparently sort of just. . . lost it. He'd managed to get close enough to a soldier to bite him in the neck before kicking him in the stomach, swinging his other leg around to the soldier who'd stormed towards them. It had taken three batons to finally knock him down.

"Don't tell Noah I said this," Kane had said quietly as Bellamy and Sergeant Miller carried her dad to the stretcher. "But. . . well, he saved Raven's life. He's a hero."

     Lyra had just nodded. She already knows.

     Then Kane had shuffled around for something in his pack, pulling out a familiar cassette. "He brought this with him. He wanted to give it to you himself."

     It was the Walkman. Lyra had taken it uneasily.

     Kane had looked stricken by her silence. He even looked like he wanted to say something, but then Abby was calling his name, shouting Noah needed help, and then he was gone in a flash.

Now Bellamy is somewhere up ahead, enshrouded by the swarm of people staggering into the gates. Lyra is straggling near the back, her shoulders hunched low and her head hanging. Clarke is the only one who marches beside her.

"I'm leaving," Clarke says abruptly.

Lyra's eyes widen. "What?"