private affair ✨ || ksj au [COMPLETED]

1.8

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"What if I did hear you?"
Yongsun stayed silent. Her mind feeling sober all of a sudden. Like she had never drunk in her life.
"Did you?" she eventually spoke up after a few moments. Unsure what answer she would prefer to hear.
"I'm not sure. Maybe."
She let out a tired giggle. "You either heard it or not. There isn't an inbetween."
"I'm not sure," Seokjin quietly repeated, "I'm not sure because there's no way what I heard was anything but a fever dream."
"Depends on what you heard," she smirked, "Maybe you didn't hear me after all."
"Well.. tell me what you said and I tell you if it's what I heard," he countered with a chuckle.
He felt her shaking her head on his shoulder. Laughing under her breath. "Better not. I don't want you to avoid me for real."
"I promise I won't," he quietly smiled. "Just tell me. There's no way what I heard was real anyway."
"Why are you so sure about it?"
"'Cause there's no way someone like you could've feelings for me."

Yongsun froze. The darkness around them lying like an invisible weight on her. With eyes wide open, she felt her lips trembling. She wanted to say something, but didn't know what. A lump formed in her throat.
"What.. what do you mean someone like me?" she eventually chocked out. Perhaps the alcohol did effect her mind after all, since she didn't understand. There wasn't any distance between them or so she believed at least.

"Yong.." he breathed out. Eyes blinking tiredly in the dim light. Trying settling his thoughts, which were wandering around. "You, you're.. you're such a badass. And feisty. And a sunshine. You're a real sunshine." He was rambling mindlessly, just blurting out every word that came up his mind when thinking about her. Drunk giggles escaping his lips in between of sentences. Being completely out of place, making his words sound like another one of his jokes. Although they were genuine. Completely forgetting that she was in fact right beside him. "And kind and caring. And besides you're.. you're neomu aleumdawo." His words were followed by another chuckle as he closed his eyes. "So damn beautiful. Has anyone ever told you how beautiful you are? So why would someone like you.." His voice trailed off then. Leaving them in silence once again. 

Yongsun heaved her flushed cheek from his shoulder, staring at him bewildered. It would be an understatement to say she was taken aback by his blunt words. However, he had caught her so off guard that she simply didn't know how to probably act in her state.
A small giggle escaping her lips. Followed by another. Evolving into a fit of giggles. Startling him a bit as he didn't expect such a reaction. But as his mind wasn't that clear either, he started laughing along with her.
The whole situation seeming quite funny to both of them.
Even in her intoxicated state she was able recognising his every feature. His full lips, his puffy red cheeks and the soft eyes. And the sound of his laughter filling the air.

Her fingers grabbing his hand firmer as their laughs died down.
This time she couldn't sense that aching feeling inside her. The feeling she had been so used to when being with him. No, it wasn't aching at all. It was burning.
She felt her chest burning the closer she got to him.
"Jin, hey," she smiled, lightly patting his cheek. Forcing him to open his glossy eyes. He held her gaze as he watched her draw even closer to him. "Don't you dare sleep on me again," she whispered then. Their faces inches apart. The expression in her eyes having changed to the intense and serious one that always made something inside him freeze.
Her hand was still on his right cheek. And without thinking much, she sat down on his lap. Thighs on each side of his. He could feel her warm body on top of him.
Her fingers leaving his grip then, wandering to his face as well. And she lightly squished both his cheeks. Making his plum lips pout like a puffer fish, as she thought. Causing another small giggle to escape her lips.
"Since when do you think so low of yourself?" Her voice not above a whisper. "Where's my super confident Jinnie? The guy who knows how amazing he is?"
"Maybe I just pretend being confident."
She shook her head, smiling. "I don't believe that. Not you."
He smiled as well. His brown irises still resting on hers. "You're right. But I still don't think someone as great as y-"
"I really don't know where this low self-esteem suddenly comes from," she quietly said then. Interrupting him as she couldn't hear it again. Those words breaking her heart. As if she would be someone better, someone out of reach. Someone untouchable.
She brushed a streak from his forehead. Smiling. "But I do have feelings for you."

For a moment, he just stared at her, a sad small forming on his lips. "I'm just a shy, introverted, wannabe actor," he muttered. His gaze falling to the space between them.
The way he put it bringing that ache back to her chest. And she squished his cheeks more.
"I'm actually a very shy and introverted person, too, you know? You might not pretend being confident, but I do pretend being badass. So I won't seem vulnerable and easy to get advantage of."
Her voice holding a sadness that made his heart drop. His eyes met hers again. Seeing this lovely smile of hers still being on her lips. "Except with you. I never pretended when being with you. I don't know why. I just never felt like I did."

He stopped breathing for a second when sensing her hot breath on his skin. And he smiled to himself. His hands slowly leaving the ground then. Gliding over her thighs, to her hips. Eventually wrapping themselves around her lower back.
"Maybe that's why I broke one rule after another right from the start," she continued, "You never wanted to take advantage of me. You were just being your adorable and funny self. And I could see that you were just as lonely as I was. And still you managed to always make me laugh. You were just the kindest guy I've ever met and besides, you're so damn handsome! I know you often joke about it, but has anyone ever told you that?" Her copying his previous words made him laugh. At least as much as he could with her hands still squeezing his cheeks. Feeling her body vibrating against his.
And he felt happy. He felt happy in that moment.

Her hands cupping his cheeks even more then as she slowly leaned in.
"So why wouldn't someone like me have feelings for you? Besides that it makes me break my number one rule."
He felt his heart beating hard against his broad chest. It felt like a fever dream or a delirium rush and he wasn't sure if it was coming from the soju or just the mere sense of her so close to him. He could almost taste the liquor on her lips.
The corners of his lips tucked into a smile. "But Yong," he breathed out. His hand finding its way on the back of her neck. "Those rules were for clients and we were always more than that."
His lips closing the gap between them.

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