The girl in the cardigan

A stricken soul can be worse than physical pain.

I didn't see how to look at the planet without wanting to hide my face.
The sun was burning and I felt weird walking outside.
I had to take a taxi, or a motorcycle taxi.
But I thought that no one would want to take me.
Some people looked at me and knew who I was after a long exam, but they didn't believe how I got to that situation.
I didn't even know it myself. I had been walking for two hours.
The people who were on the sidewalk and avoided touching me and I agonized to be there.
I had a paper with the address I took from the internet and from what I saw, I was arriving.
I felt chills, and I started to hear nearby buzz and just had to go through that curve.
My stomach churned, and my hands shook.
It is so agonizing for people to be desperate to be a successful professional, but I was only looking for money to pay the bills.
I had the phone, the water...
I started to despair when I realized it was coming.
I was not well presented, but better than before that I didn't care so much. I saw it, I arrived, my heart was racing!
A trailer was parked with a large tarpaulin around it.
There was a group singing and making their art that was intriguing and full of energy.
It was hula hoops, back and forth, hits, back and forth, a girl riding a wheeled bicycle while throwing balls in the air and holding them in her hands back.
The silence was filled with music that the group sang.
- One pirouette / Two pirouettes / Bravo, bravo / Super-silhouettes / Ultrapirouettes / Bravo, bravo / Jump over the bleachers / And fall on your nose / That the guys / Will ask for / / That the guys / Will ask for...
There was a large group of people watching the juggler, the dancer, the bullet man ...
But I ran to the back of the trailer. Nobody could see me.
I nervously thought about going home when I ran into the woman I saw on the sign up.
Frightened and being examined, I thought about hurrying out of there, but where I was looking there were people making noise.
Adona from the circus then looked at me smiling and said:
- The interview is out here in the crowd. I'm tired of not finding an ideal contractor, and I hope you don't waste my time. We have been traveling the world for 30 years.
"Huh?" I asked, confused and cornered.
She laughed. She was a 60 - year - old woman, more or less.
- Did you come because of the job?
I swallowed hard thinking for a long time and came the house bills and the mortgage.
- I saw it! - I answered quickly, before I regretted it.
- Great! Because the circus missed a clown.
From what I realized, the circus was formed by most women, that is, 97%.
- What happened to the other one?
- She resigned because she was happy. Something came into your life and left you with that feeling.
- You mean it's just sad, will you be the next one to work here? But is it based on sadness?
- It's more real. And what I see is you are totally ruined. The headlines with your face caught my eye and you are here! What I see in the other candidates is a little happiness.
I hid when I saw the professionals running to change costumes into the trailer for the back.
They were in such a hurry that they didn't even notice me.
- If you're ashamed, you won't be able to get hired - she said and wore a different outfit.
I stopped and approached her asking:
- Will you hire me?
- Do you accept leave everything for us to follow?
- Me…
- Do you have anything to lose?
- No.
She screamed excitedly, and I felt welcomed, because she didn't care or wanted that for her show, my conditions.
- My name is Melody - she introduced herself and you are Latrense. A new name I hear.
I moved my head wobbly.
- Is that Sabrina was going to put Lawrence, but decided that she was going to stay with Latrense to see my reaction when I grow up.
Melody put an arm around my shoulders and pulled me to walk the moment a girl with a waddle was arriving.
- Ah, this is our clown! - She exclaimed with a tight suit and glitter on her face.
I tried to smile, wanting to be successful.
- This is Emily and Emily, this is Latrense.
- Hi - she said and it looked like it was just, the clown's obligation to be sad.
- Hi, I mumbled - very depressing was my tone.
- I could see why she hired her, and I even felt it.
- The interview was quick or didn't even need to be done.
- She's depressing.
I mumbled in the corner.
- We are 50 roadblocks bringing joy to the world. This is a home vehicle - Melody is proudly air-conditioned and equipped with the necessary furniture. The dorms are divided between boys and girls.
Suddenly, a little candy that I didn't know or didn't remember that was in my trouser pocket fell when it was stirred, rolling on the steep lawn of part of that land.
The three of us hypnotized that little ball that rolled.
And how did it stop?
My heart seemed to have screamed when I saw a color paint me.
I saw someone who caught the candy and...