Keeping Secrets: Baljeet X Buford

Chapter 5

There's nothing like a kiss from someone cute.

That's what Buford's father had told him when he was really little, before the man had run off with some bottle blonde and left him and his mother alone. And really, Baljeet was the cutest person Buford knew. It wouldn't go well with his image if people knew he thought like that. He was glad there's no such thing as mind readers. Hopefully.

The kiss in question had been so... Small. Insignificant. At least, it should have been. They'd kissed on the lips, and yet he was hung up over a tiny, fleeting on-the-cheek kiss. Maybe it was how innocent it had been, so sweet and so kind. Maybe it was because he'd been in a good mood, and hadn't been expecting it. Maybe it was because Baljeet had looked so happy, so relaxed. Maybe he was starting to like the affection.

It didn't have to mean anything... Well, that's what he told himself. It was just because he'd lost his father at an early age, and his mother was working almost all the time. He never got much attention at all. Having Baljeet smile at him, hold his hand and kiss him every day was like some kind of miracle.

'Buford!'

'Huh?' he snapped out of his thoughts, glancing up from his untouched dinner plate to his mother, who frowned at him. 'Sorry, what?'

'I asked why you're not eating,' her blue eyes, so much like his, were filled with concern. 'Are you feeling alright, sweetie?'

'I'm not hungry.'

His mother let out a sigh and picked up his plate, placing it on the counter. 'You're going to regret it later on, you know,' she mumbled as she turned back to him. 'You look a bit sad. How was your day?'

Buford just grunted, getting ready to leave. His mother stopped him with a well-aimed comment. 'That Baljeet kid seems to be around more often, lately.'

'Uh,' it wasn't a question, but he felt like he was obligated to answer. He swallowed with difficulty and looked away, unable to lie to her when they had eye contact. 'We're trying to be more friendly, y'know, without all the bullying.'

His mother smiled and exclaimed at this, but Buford said nothing, downing his glass of water and standing up to go to his room. He wouldn't ever be able to tell her about him and Baljeet. He couldn't mention the mission, so if he told her, he'd have to say he liked the kid. And his mother wasn't exactly... Well, she was a homophobe. No way of putting it lightly.

Because of this, he'd convinced Baljeet (and their friends) not to say anything to her. Baljeet had been surprised, and had exclaimed that he'd thought women were more lenient towards that sort of thing.

Buford thought it'd be easier telling his mother they were just really close friends than saying, 'Oh, he's just a guy I'm dating then going to absolutely destroy so the fucking secret that your fucking ex decided to rape me doesn't come out. Oh? You didn't know? Maybe because I didn't fucking tell you! Contrary to popular belief, I don't enjoy making people's lives hell! Especially my mother's!'

He began to leave the room, but just as he reached the door, his mother spoke. 'Buford,' she said softly. 'You know I'll always be here for you, right? No matter what.'

His hands tightened into fists, his thoughts immediately going back to when he was younger. When his mother had left him alone with that... thing. Had ignored his crying, told him he'd be fine, and then just fucking left. She'd walked straight out the door to her stupid book club. He remembered running up to the window and watching her as she got into her car and drove away, whispering, 'please, don't go, don't leave me with him!'

He could still hear the man's dark laughter as he snapped back into reality, back into his kitchen in the here and now.

'Yeah, right,' he muttered to her statement, and walked out.