Swinging my Tears Away.

🗯Snow and Swings.🗯

Crunch.

Crunch.

Crunch.

The steps of soft boots could be heard as they pressed into the snowy substance on the ground.

Everything was so calm.

You hate it.

Crunch.

Crunch.

Crunch.

You wonder how you got here.

The area is littered with a pleasant and blissful silence, the air so light and soft, yet you find it hard to breathe. The chest that hides behind your coat seems to shrivel and tingle with this... terrible feeling. What was happening? Why do you feel this way?

...How could this happen?

Crunch.

Stomp.

Stomp Stomp Stomp

You start to run.

You don't care to where, but you run. You run until you reach somewhere far away. You need to run away from this place.

You just want to go away.

You don't know why your cheeks feel sticky, why your eyes burn and your nose clogs up. You don't know why your breath hitches with every step, why you start making an agonized cry of a sound with every throb in your chest. It's likely due to that stupid heart of yours. It's so stupid, it's so stupid stupid stupid STUPID STUPID STUPID

You hate everything. You don't know why, but you also don't care. You just hate everything. You curse your stupid heart for rushing your pulse every time something joyous happens, every time something good is abroad. 

You want to rip that piece of trash organ out of your chest, hoping that if you do that... you'll go numb, that you'll be able to tear away this dreadful emotion of a bandaid from your being, that you'll stop feeling. That nothing bad might happen anymore. That... no one gets hurt anymore. That you'll stop hurting, as well as hurting others.

That you'll stop overreacting.

Of course.

This is just an overreaction.

You're just acting like a stupid baby... stop it. Deal with this maturely. It's fine. Stop overreacting.

The enraged stomping comes to a stop, and all that could be heard was a bitter laugh, sounding choked and muffled by your cries (...Cries? Since when had you been crying?) as a pitiful feeling rattled in your chest with every breath. You don't bother to wipe your cheeks as saline drips from your face, for you're too preoccupied with your mind.

Your small head can't help but dance in a storm of thoughts. All the time. Every day, every minute, and every second of your life, your head just raged with so many questions and wants... and you don't know why. So many things going on inside you... so many raging emotions and surges of unbelievable agony rush through you, almost enough to make you buckle. It all comes into a wave, making you want to scream. You want to chase and destroy every thought. You would do anything just for a moment of silence and bliss in your life, just for a single second of peace. To feel warm... and stop feeling like you're going to explode inside from everything that numbly races inside of you.