Remembering Love (Tomarry) (HP)

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a/n
hello the rewrite will be getting it's own book. it is called "Love (And Other Feelings Best Forgotten) Remembered" and will be 1000% better than this one. it will keep a lot of ascepts of this one but a LOT will be changed, too. it will also include spoilers for this book.
they can be regarded seperately, or side by side, but it's really a "mirror fic."
it will be better written than this one and i would've just dropped this one entirely, but ive put over ten hours of work into this and it feels a shame to let it go so easily.
if you have taste go check out to rewrite/mirror fic.
anyway enjoy this chapter where the Plot Thickens
word count: 630

Severus Snape sometimes makes stupid decisions. Not often, but still far too much. He has made mistakes and now lives to pay for them. He cannot tell whether his biggest mistake was calling Lily a Mudblood, or joining the Death Eaters because of her betrayal.

You chose James over me, Lils. Look where it got you. But being alive's not any better, is it? Not that you'd know.

He sometimes monotones I'm sorry to the girl no longer alive enough to hear and sometimes thinks he's lying when he does. He is a man with many mistakes but not one with any regrets. So if asked what he would change if he got a do over, Severus would say, plainly, nothing. He is where he needs to be in the present and although it's a path paved in blood, it is all that matters.

He is a double spy, one working for himself and himself only, and his loyalty is to no one in particular. When Severus intercepts a letter from Lord Voldemort, the Death Eater part of him screams to deliver it and let it be. There will always be a part of him, though, the side of him stuck up on Lily and stuck up on the Light, that begs to ask for a second opinion.

So ask for a second opinion he does. He marches to Remus Lupin's office, letter in hand, and waits for Lupin to make tea. Lupin is clear headed at the worst of times and regrets his misdemeanor toward Severus as a child, so Severus finds his company the closest thing to comfortable as they come.

"My Lord asks of this person to report back on the mission Lucius Malfoy passed on to him," explained Severus. "The mission is question was last year, regarding the horcrux that is currently alive but currently unresponsive."

Remus hums lightly. "You've read the letter?" he asks.

Severus tilts his head as if to say and what of it?

Remus flusters then says, "Erm, why are you hesitant to send the letter?"

Because there is a part of me that cannot let go. I am childish, Lupin, childish beyond belief and I cannot move on. Harry Potter is so much like his father but too much like his mother for me to ignore, Severus thinks but does not say. Instead he voices, "The safety of Harry Potter may be a stake."

Remus shifts, eyes alert. "Why so?" he asks, his tone light but words heavy.

"The person in question was sent into the mission wearing a ring made from my Lord's blood and magic. Hypothetically, if the diary horcrux was to be destoryed, it would be able to latch onto the blood and magic of its soul."

"And you think it worked?"

Severus exhales deeply. "Yes. But that is not the problem."

"Then what is?"

"The person in question is yet to realize it... but they will, if they see this letter."

"Realize what?" Remus bites.

"That Harry Potter is wearing the described ring."

Silence. Ringing and thick in the air.

"That's..." Remus sighs, running a hand through his hair. "That's certianly not ideal. I would say don't send it, Severus."

Severus nods because that, too, had been his train of thought. Confirmation is always best in situations of uncertainty. Neither of them voiced the unspoken question of Does Harry know he's wearing a piece of the Dark Lord's soul? but it was heard nonetheless.

Severus finishes his tea and moves to leave, but Remus calls out-- "Who was the 'person in question'?" It's asked reverently, as if he would really rather not know but curiosity complells him.

A twisted grin makes its way onto his face and Severus answers, his voice mocking, "Why, Ronald Weasly, of course."