REMEDY 2 (Yoongi fanfic)

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

"so am i some sort of milestone?" she asks quietly giving him a confused face. she unconsciously clutches her stomach and looks up her voice shaking slighty "is this some sor-"

But he stands up cutting in not letting her finish "That's not fair!" his loud deep voice takes her by surprise and she filnches in her place.

she blinks back the tears forming in her eyes quickly, not letting them fall. his impassioned reaction causes her to react in the same tone "that's how i feel right now. like a destination. not someone you trust enough to confide in"

his expression goes from hurt to angry in a matter of seconds "you think that's what you mean to me?" he sounds purely provoked. it feels like the tables have turned and he stands on the other end of betrayal.

"i don't know. is it?" she sighs dropping her voice automatically low. she feels her body hurt and her tears finally fall at her own response. despite the rage Yoongi feels his heart leap unpleasantly at the sight and it takes everything in him to not reach out. how did they get to this point, with both of them left scarred?

She puts a hand to her trembling lips and looks away. how can she explain to him how it feels to accidentally hear what she heard over the phone? to see the way he touched another girl frantically to the point of making her scream without even a warning? was it too much to want to feel trustworthy with the man she loved? the man she was gonna have a child with?

but she restrains herself from saying any of those as they feel too pointless to mention right now. if he doesn't understand she won't be feeding him answers either. so she just goes back to what pokes at her mind repeatedly.

"i feel like i've been just a safety net. someone to keep you in line"

He opens his mouth to reply but quickly closes it as a new set of tears fall down her face and she lets out a quiet sob.

"is that how you see it? that i'm out of line?" he asks finally able to speak. yet he feels he doesn't have any strength left in him. the past few minutes feel surreal and far from reality. he wishes that it's all just an argument like any other and it'll blow over in a minute. he knows it's not. but still he can't bring himself to accept that after all this time she stands there thinking so little of him.

"i don't think i can do this anymore" Soojin says tiredly through another sob glancing at him apologetically. the words spill out of her mouth and it feels like they've been soaking there for months now.

"do what?" Yoongi frowns taking a step closer to where she stands by the window.

She shakes her head and another tear falls off her face before she looks up at him.
"i don't think we can make this right "

"don't you think we have to at least try?" he asks eagerly and immediately. like he had that response ready from the moment he started explaining everything.

"it shouldn't be this hard. it shouldn't be this complicated" she turns away leaning on one hand against the countertop. there's no sound to her tears but her shoulders slightly vibrate and it's enough to disengage him of his pride.

Yoongi walks around her and pulls her in. she doesn't hug him back immediately but after a long moment she wraps her arms around him too. still he can tell that she's struggling to relax in his embrace so he runs his fingers over the hair falling down the side of her temple.

She pulls away to look at him, still breathing heavily, her lids and the tip of her small nose red. He looks down at her and feels his own eyes start to sting too. they both stare back in fear of what the other might say in just a moment.

Yoongi thinks how he had hoped for this to be just a discussion. an argument. a fight at tops. not this. this seems worse. they seem to have hit a dead end.

He opens his mouth and her heart clenches as her bottom lip quivers uncontrollably, but instead of speaking he leans down and takes her mouth with his.

startled she stiffens at first, but he doesn't move his lips in any way, giving her time to decide. yet after only a second she reacts opening her mouth to his, giving his tnogue permission to glide against hers.

Soojin restlessly shifts from one side to another remembering how he urgently took her on the couch then too. one last time before she left. fueling off of their fear they had gone at it for hours. after, she had felt like it was a mistake to give in but still the memory causes her body unconsciously to ache for him.

She doubts anything could ever make her feel as good as him and she doesn't dare touch herself to find out. the vibration of the phone in the pocket of her jacket brings her out of those thoughts. his name on the screen makes her heart jump a little.

"hi" she answers, her voice a soft sigh.
"hey" he replies instantly, his husky voice worn out. she leads with silence, not sure what she should say, so she waits for him to continue.
"Did you get home safe?" he asks.

"yes. i'm home" she says a little indifferently but deep down she wishes that she could bicker about the long tiring drive, and the crazy lady who almost spilled her hot coffee on her in the bumpy road, but she keeps quiet.

"are you feeling better now?" laying on the same couch it had happened, he asks hushedly referring to her discomfort after their long run the day before and she feels her cheeks start to heat up as she was just thinking about it.
"yeah i'm okay" she declares quickly and unsure, wanting to move one from it.

"i'm sorry i went a little rough on you, i should have been more careful..." his mind trails off to how he had lost himself in the moment last night and overstimulated her unintentionally, making her cry. but he doesn't know that she didn't mind that.

the memory is still fresh in both their minds, if she focuses on his voice over the line she can feel his breath down her back once more. it had felt like a sad goodbye when he had shuddered holding her close one last time, and that was the reason she cried before she told him she wanted to go away for awhile.

an uncomfortable silence falls between them when she doesn't reply and he sighs deeply.
"you should rest i won't bother you. but call me if you need anything anytime"

just as he's about to hang up, against her better judgment she calls out quietly. her voice a little too emotional.

"yoongi..."

"yes?" he replies, listening closely and alerted but just hears her heavy breaths come and go for a short minute before she talks again.

"goodnight" she says and hangs up. her heart aching as she holds the phone close to her chest. she feels hurt to her bones. all the people she has come to know in her life feel like strangers she has never known.

she feels betrayed. like everybody believes religously that she's incapable of handling anything.

just then her phone rings again and without a moment of hesitation she turns it off.