What Anxiety Feels Like (DNF/ Dream not found angst)

No Hope is Being Kept Alive

The stream was in full action as usual. Screaming came from every side as the game got intense.

Everyone could tell that George wasn't in his normal mood. There was no exasperated screams or banter coming from him. Just an occasional argument and laughs.

Luckily, before they had started streaming and before George signed on, Dream told everyone to back off of George for just that day. Quackity protested but ultimately agreed once Dream threatened to not join.

So, no one messed with George the way they usually would. George took notice straight away but was thankful for it. He knew it must have had something to do with Dream.

Dream spent extra time making George comfortable. He didn't want George to get mad at him for making him join so didn't want him to regret joining. The chat noticed and he knew it would be in a fanfiction soon after but he really didn't care.

Everything was going pretty okay for George. The pressure was definitely still there. He felt the doom and knew it was coming eventually but he genuinely was trying to push it off and it was working.

That is until it stopped working.

And George could tell right away.

His constant tired and coldness since the morning turned into something worse. Instead it became slowly frantic.

It started in his hands like it always did. He felt the tremble start to make it hard to play the game. He tried to steady it but the more he tried- the worse it got.

Next was his heart beat. It had been irregular all day but now it was jumping around. it was getting heavier and heavier- like he had just run a mile while sitting in his chair.

Still trying to contain himself, he closed his eyes to breath slowly. Counting.. More counting... breathing... please breathe...

His eyes shot back open. It's not working.

The next to slip was his focus. He stared at the game and tried to get some part of it. He tried to understand what was going on but nothing... just nothing...

He could hear people speak but not make out what they were saying.

Then came the worst of it. The breathing.

What started out as just deep breaths turned into a wheeze like inhale. He tried his best to steady it. Tried all of the tricks and tips. But it was too late.

His breathes turned shorter but harder like every inhale was becoming more and more useless.

Without even realizing he had died in the game. Distantly he heard people yelling at him but he couldn't understand them. He just started at the screen confused. What was going on? What were they saying?

Without any explanation he left the game and the call.

He needed to calm himself. He needed to breath. He needed to stay sane or else he would have another pani-

George's eyes widened at that simple thought. Just the idea of having another panic attack sent him deep into one. He was wasn't going to make it out and was sure of it.

He tried to get out of his chair but only fell straight onto the ground.

'please breath please breath I don't want to die!' He tugged at his throat trying to get some air trough. However, the overwhelming fear of everything around him took every last sense of reality he had.

He didn't know when it started but he was sobbing. He was sobbing loud and hard. He felt like there were demons surrounding him, ready to take him down to hell. They surrounded him- suffocated him.