Sam Walker and the Grim Reaper Services (ONC 2021)

5 - Unknown Serial Killer 492

"You can't do that!" Sam protested, outraged. He knew it was probably the stupidest thing he could have done, argue with the Grim Reaper and his sister, but between the fear and horror caused by Jake's murder and the exhaustion and stress caused by the lack of sleep the night before (really, the lack of sleep since starting college), he wasn't exactly thinking straight and he knew it. "You can't just kill me! It's illegal!"

"Do you have proof in a court of law?" the Grim Reaper flashed back.

"We're in a court of law!" Sam thundered. "Or whatever this is!"

"First Deathly Circuit General Court," Stan coughed. Sam turned and glared him back into silence.

"You have no evidence," the Grim Reaper maintained. "If I were to, as you put it, 'kill' you, no one could prove it."

"Witnesses? This whole damn courtroom? The jury? My sudden lack of existence?"

"That's just it," Cate interrupted. "Sam, you don't exist."

"Sure I do," Sam argued. "Check my birth certificate, social security number, driver's license, hell, my student ID! Samuel Walker exists, I can assure you."

The Grim Reaper rolled his eyes. "You mortals and your petty excuses for identification. How many identity thefts happen every year, with people claiming to be who they aren't? Not to mention aliases? Pseudonyms? Mistaken identity? Witness protection program? Legal changes of name? Huh? If your mortal records were so thorough, such excellent ways to prove existence, then how come people can masquerade as someone they're not? Care to explain, Mr. Walker?"

Sam was silent, glaring angrily at the Grim Reaper.

"Let me explain in a different way," he went on, with a weary sigh. He ran his hand through his jet black hair. "If you work in a store, you have records of who buys what, correct? You can check the record of your sales for the day."

"Sort of, yeah," Sam agreed, thinking to his time spent working in Caffeinated.

"Okay. Now picture someone walks in and tells you they bought something from your store and want to return it. But they have no receipt. Can you take it back?"

"Um, Pete?" Cate interrupted quietly. "Some mortal stores will take objects back without a receipt, as long as they sell that item. They take it on honor, I guess."

The Grim Reaper turned and looked at her, incredulous. "What? They do? Why? They could be scamming them for their money back! That's what I would do!"

Cate just shrugged. "I don't make the rules. I'm just trying to help your analogy."

The Grim Reaper took a deep breath, closing his eyes for a moment. "All right then. To return to our example, your store has a no returns without a receipt policy. So that person, without the receipt, is making an argument that they bought the object from your store, and they need to return it. But they can't provide the receipt. However, they show you a shopping list they had made for your store and the item they're trying to return is listed on it, and they claim that's all the proof you need. Can you take back the item, based on that shopping list?"

"If they don't have a receipt, by the policy, I can't," Sam said, getting a bad feeling in his stomach. "But this isn't that! I'm alive, I know that! Ask anyone, ask my professors, my roommates, my sister, my parents! They'll all affirm they know a Sam Walker!"

"That's even worse than a shopping list," the Grim Reaper stated. "That's, like, a text message from your mom saying you need to get this item at some random store."

"But sometimes, you really did purchase something from a store," Sam argued. "But you lost the receipt for it and you can't find it, but you really need to return the item. So you go to the store and you explain it to them, and they happen to notice it's the same exact brand as that sold there. So they take it back anyway."