The Hours We Have

chapter six

With an exhausted sigh, I said goodbye to my coworkers, who thanked me profusely for staying over, and I collected my things from my locker. I briefly checked my phone, I saw two missed calls from Ezra before I rolled my eyes. He never texted, always called, but if it was important he would have left a voicemail. 

I stepped out into the chilly night, pulling on the sleeves of my t-shirt as if it would protect me, and my left hand slipped into my purse. I always carried a can of mace with me, I had paranoia so bad it wasn't even funny, and I readied it to thwart an attack as I began walking. 

It was only an eight-minute walk back to my house. The streets were well lit the entire way and businesses lined both sides of the street, I had never felt uncomfortable on these streets. It wasn't even known for any kind of crime but that didn't mean it couldn't happen when I least expected it so I scanned around myself with every step. 

Black and white cars were parked along the street, the streetlights glittering off their windshields and shiny paint, but long shadows stretched across the pavement. Like a predator in the night, the shadows were lurking and waiting for the perfect moment to strike, and I clutched my only defense against being kidnapped as if my life depended on it.

I hadn't texted to let my brothers know I was working overtime but it was becoming pretty normal for me. I always picked up extra shifts where I could. Not to mention they probably hadn't even noticed I was still gone. They never really cared either way. A cool breeze kicked up some newspapers across the street and I wrapped my arms around myself. 

When my house finally came into view, I noticed the downstairs lights were off. That was typical. I could have gotten kidnapped and my brothers wouldn't notice until a week later. 

I suppressed a yawn, pushing away my bothersome feelings. Maybe if I didn't feel so much, I wouldn't get hurt so often. But right now, I was truly exhausted and I just wanted a hot shower before I went to bed. 

I dug my set of keys from my purse and went to unlock the front door, only to find it already unlocked. I frowned. That was a little odd, Mikeal was a neat freak and he often double-checked to make sure the front door was locked. 

I took a deep breath and pushed open the door. 

Cautiously, I kicked off my shoes and then I walked further into the house. There wasn't any light besides the little one over the sink but I couldn't see any furniture out of place. I have no idea why my mind was always assuming the worst but I flipped on the light switch closest to me.

Before the light even came on, I jumped a mile high when someone roughly grabbed my wrist and I spun around to meet Ezra's dark eyes. He must have been in the living room. My brows furrowed, in the dark? 

"Where have you been?" His voice was low. 

I shoved him, forcing him to let go, "What is wrong with you? You can't just grab me like that." My heart was racing but I refused to let him know he had truly startled me. 

"Answer me." 

My jaw clenched, "Why do you care?" 

He ignored me. Shocker, right? "I called and you never answered." 

"Oh, that's funny," I began sarcastically, "I seem to remember texting you three times last night, and guess what? You never answered a single one." I knew I would never get an answer, his whereabouts were always a secret, and that irritated me. 

He glared down at me, "Just answer the question." 

Crossing my arms, I felt irritation boiling up inside me. He really was being hypocritical and I was going to give him a taste of his own medicine. "Not until you tell me where you were last night." 

His dark eyes scrutinized me for a solid minute before he bluntly said, "You're sleeping around, aren't you?" 

"I'm--what?!" I screeched in disbelief. "You think... how could you even think that?" I stepped forward and shoved him hard. "I'm not whoring around, you asshole." 

"You disappear a lot." He wasn't fazed. 

My blood lit on fire. "Oh, you're one to talk, aren't you? You're just a hypocrite and you never grew out of that stage. I hardly think you have ground to be interrogating me right now."

His eyes narrowed. "Now you're just being a defensive bitch." 

I was pretty sure my entire body twitched, like an eyelid would when the anger was so close to breaking loose, and my fists unintentionally bawled up. Only Ezra could bring me to his level of irrationality and impulsive action. I forced myself to inhale, long and hard. 

"You know what?" I stated with fragile calm. "You've been ignoring me for weeks and I've dealt with it. If you ever cared, you would know I was at work, but you just ignore everyone around you." I gestured with my hand. "And this...whatever you've made up in your head, just stop it." 

He stayed silent, his dark presence brooding and provoking. If I had even touched a nerve, he didn't show it. His face was frustratingly blank, like always, and I was faintly surprised that he was even controlling his anger. Usually, he erupted at the simplest of words. 

"Just keep acting like I don't exist," I snapped when he didn't respond, "At least I know how you truly feel about me."

It took me a moment to realize what I just said. I had made the mistake of letting my thoughts out of my head. Despite how I hadn't lied about those words, I couldn't look at him. Instead, I immediately pushed past him and he didn't stop me. 

For the first time, I had caught him speechless. Ezra always had the last word. Our arguments usually always followed the same pattern, biting at each other about things that had happened in the past few weeks, and I was tired of it. I was tired of his actions, when would he grow up? 

I hurried up the stairs, squeezing by a confused Mikeal on the eighth step. He had most likely heard the arguing and was on his way to investigate but I didn't stop. Mikeal called after me and I slammed the door to my bedroom. He could ask Ezra for all I cared. 

I still couldn't believe my own brother would think that about me. I walked over to my window, gazing out on the horizon of city lights, and my tired thoughts wandered. Ever since Mom had died, we really did misunderstand each other. Everything was unclear between the five of us and we didn't have the guts to own up to it. We were still kids in a way, hiding from the monster in the closet, which turned out to be reality. 

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I still feel like a kid, that's for sure. 

It's almost April 1st! Regular weekly updates are on the horizon ;) even though I've accidentally let six chapters escape early *shrug*

Real fact: I've actually been on four dates without my brothers knowing. None turned out serious and I've never gone on a second date. Honestly not impressed with today's choice of men. Plus, I have enough guys in my life at the moment lol