Oliver silently slides his lockpicks into the cheap lock on the doorknob. These people seriously need to update their security system, it's just getting too easy to steal from rich people.
He isn't complaining about that in the slightest. Oliver makes his living off of rich people who don't properly protect their ostentatious wealth. His favourite is their tendency to not wire their rear entrance to the rest of the security system, as though thieves wouldn't think to try to get in via the back door. Do they think no one will climb over the fence? Idiots. Rich idiots may be annoying, but they are remarkably easy to steal from.
The lock clicks open, making Oliver smile. The house he is breaking into is vulgarly extravagant, all ornately decorated with marble and gold. He pushes open the door, pauses a second to be sure he hasn't tripped any alarm, then steps inside. Oliver finds himself in large room with high ceilings, marble floor tiles, and blank white walls covered in expensive paintings which all clash with one another.
"No accounting for taste." Oliver mumbles to himself, disgust audible in every word he says. These hideous paintings are worth millions, enough to feed so many people Any single one of these paintings could buy his retirement for life, but that is not why Oli is here.
Some say that there is no honour among thieves, but Oliver would beg to differ. He takes three kinds of jobs. One, stealing something to return it to its rightful owners, from museum displays to Nazi gold. Two, stealing things to redistribute them to those in need. And three, stealing things to make a point.
Tonight, Oliver is stealing for the third reason. The owner of this house is a billionaire who donated millions to anti-gay organization. Oliver has heard that this same man has a giant painting of two women having sex, that he commissioned himself. Oli will be hanging it on front gates to the man's estate for everyone to see the hypocrisy. Oliver is a gay man, and he has no intention of letting someone oppress people like him while getting off on other gay couples.
Now, Oliver thinks to himself, If I were a fancy erotic painting, where would I be?
A man like this wouldn't want any guest to happen across the painting, so Oliver figures that it must be upstairs somewhere, maybe even in the bedroom. Walking quietly, carefully in the dim light of the moon shining through the windows, Josh makes his way up the stairs. Unlike just about any other staircase in the world, this one makes no noise as Oliver climbs it. One of the only good things about being in rich people's houses.
The man who own this gaudy house has a sitting room attached to his bedroom, and Oliver doesn't even want to think about what has happened in here. The design positively stinks of toxic masculinity, from the fish plaques on the wall to the rows and rows of imported cigars. Oli rolls his eyes.
The door between the sitting room and the bedroom is shut firmly, so Oliver looks around. It isn't hard to spot the large oil painting over the fireplace, depicting two overly-exploited women entangled with one another on a bed. In the bottom right corner there is an artist's signature, along with a short sentence dedicating the painting to the homophobic bastard.
"There it is." Oliver whispers, less than impressed by the quality of the artwork. He takes the painting down with silent precision, rolling his eyes when he feels the heavy weight of the fancy frame. There is no way that he can carry the painting out of the house with it still in the frame, so he takes out his boxcutter. He uses the blade to cleanly slice through the canvas, neatly cutting it out of the frame.
Oliver rolls up the canvas, knowing this could damage the painting but honestly not caring. Tucking the rolled up painting under his arm, Oli begins the process of exiting this elaborate house.
While he descends the stairs and moves toward the back door, Oliver thinks about his situation.
When robbing someone's house, it is important to stay aware at all times. Because of years of experience, he stays alert as he thinks.
Oliver likes stealing. He loves the thrill of lurking in the shadows, travelling as silently as possible, and stealing from the rich. It's all very exhilarating, though he will be lying if he says that he is perfectly calm.
Oliver has an anxiety disorder that leaves him anxious at any given moment. It took years of practice to control it enough to start stealing from people, but it's still there, still hidden under the surface.
Despite the thrills, the satisfaction of stealing things from those who can afford to be stolen from, Oliver is lonely. He knows that many thieves work in pairs our groups, but the always get caught more easily. Oliver has never trusted anyone enough to work with them in on illegal jobs.
Feeling lonely makes Oliver angry at himself. He is, after all, the one who decides who he allows into his life. He often finds himself wishing that there wasn't such a pervasive sense of solitude in his life, alleviated only by his pet cat.
Oliver passes by a few small paintings, hesitating and then grabbing a couple. His slim jacket is built with multiple hidden pockets, so he fills the pockets up with enough expensive art to fund multiple soup kitchens and shelters for weeks.
Squaring himself to focus as he exits the building the same way that he came in. Oli closes the door behind him and uses his lockpicks to re-lock it. The canvas goes over the fence first, then Oliver (carefully, so as not to crush the painting). He is in the trees between houses now, and the houses are wide apart. Oliver walks into the trees until he is sure that there are no cameras, then pulls on a black face mask, gloves, hat, and sweatshirt. Now that no tattoos or identifying features are visible, Oli emerges from the trees on the side of the road.
Oliver returns to the front gates of the mansion that he had previously been in. He takes a massive tube of his trust superglue from his pocket. In a few swift movements, the gates are chained shut, large amounts of super glue are coating each bar of the gate, and Josh is holding the painting against the glue. It's a pain to have to hold it in place for a while, but it will be hell to dissolve without ruining the painting, and hell to remove in general should the decision be to destroy the painting.
Oli checks his watch. It's four in morning, meaning that the early morning rich joggers will be out soon.
Satisfied that the glue has dried, Oliver walks until he is out of the area, then takes off his mask, hat, and gloves. The walk home is a long one, the change in values of the houses he passes seeming almost comical.
The mansions become large houses, which become nice houses, which become small houses, and so on.
Finally, Oli stops in an area where the houses are all bungalows and the apartments, while small, are at least for the most part clean. A comfortable middle ground.
Oliver's apartment is dark and sparsely decorated, but it feels like home. His walls are covered in his own paintings, but that's all that he really takes in before he is stumbling into his bed, turning on the fairy lights, and falling fast asleep.
It's been a long day.
~
welcome to my new story!
yet another fransykes bc I can't seem to stop writing them
let me know what yall think!!
can't believe it's almost march...time really be movin' huh
steal from the rich and remember to create and destroy as you see fit
-Samira
YOU ARE READING
Nothing But Thieves {Fransykes}
FanfictionOliver is a refined thief, he takes his time and does his job well. Josh is a smash and grab thief, smart but messy and quick. Opposites attract, right? (title is based on the band Nothing But Thieves)
