Forget-Me Not

Chapter 10

     It was hot. It was very, very hot. The air was thick and smelled of smoke. The house was on fire. I tried to pull myself up out of bed, but my body refused to move. The room just kept getting hotter and hotter and my heartbeat grew louder and louder. Still, I couldn't move. Even as I could hear flames crackling right outside my door, I remained paralyzed. I had to move. I had to move. I. Had. To. MOVE. But still, my body refused.

     I awoke shaking in a cold sweat. The heat of the flames still lingered now accompanied by my burning eyes. I took deep breaths, trying to calm myself down, but it was no use. I wanted to cry. I wanted to cry so bad, but I couldn't. I couldn't cry over such a ridiculous reason. Water. I just needed some water.

     I slowly made my way to the kitchen, trying to be as quiet as possible as to not wake up Ludwig. I couldn't let him see me like this. I grabbed a glass with a shaky hand and filled it up. I lifted it to my lips, but with the added weight of the water, my hands could support it and it ended up on the floor. I froze in my spot. Goddammit, I broke it. My stomach, which was already in knots, twisted as I heard a door open and footsteps approaching. It was as if I was back in that dream, unable to move, but shaking in fear. I couldn't cry. I couldn't cry. I kept reminding myself that until Ludwig entered the kitchen, bangs in his face and dressed in a tanned robe. He looked at me and then at the mess I had made, his expression unreadable.

     Before I could say anything, two strong arms wrapped around my shoulders. Against my wishes, I melted into the embrace and buried my nose into Ludwig's neck. We stood like this for a good few minutes until I managed to calm myself down (for the most part). He pulled away, but kept a loose grip on my shoulder as he led me to the couch.

     After another few minutes of cuddling, he got up and began to head back to the kitchen. "Wait," I murmured, "please don't go."

     "I have to clean-"

     "I...I don't...I...I don't want to be alone right now." God this was embarrassing, even more so than that first date at the park. I shifted my eyes to my lap, waiting for a scoff, a laugh, or worst of all, him to leave.

     I felt the couch sag as Ludwig rejoined me and slipped his arm around me once more. I, in turn, leaned into his side.

     "So...What exactly is going on? Nightmare?"

     "I...I suppose you could say that. More likely a memory mixed with a dream."

     He ran his fingers through my hair, massaging my scalp as he did so. It felt really nice and was very soothing. "Mind telling me more?"

     "Kind of."

     "Anything big?"

     I took in a sharp breath. I debated getting into it as the the memories of the dream came forward once more. I swore I could feel the heat of the fire. But as Ludwig's hand kept up its motion, I took a deep breath and opened up. "I was back in London...there was heat...and f-flames...I-"

     A dark look overcame Ludwig's features and his fingers froze in their spot. "Stop."

     "But you-"

     "I know I asked...that was stupid of me."

     "No it wasn't," I assured him, taking his free hand in my own, "I have to face these things eventually and it's best I do it with someone right?"

     His cheeks flushed and his gaze softened. "I-I guess, but still-"

     I knew what he was getting at. Despite feeling a bit better after telling Ludwig, my memories of the dream were more vivid. "Yeah...I think I've seen enough of whatever that was for now."

     We sat on the couch for another half-hour in comfortable silence. I kept dozing off, but Ludwig would shake me awake each time. After my third attempt, he asked, "Do you want to go to bed?"

     "Mmm." I was tired, but the remnants of my dream still left me on edge. I didn't feel like being alone. "Can we sleep together tonight?"

     Through lidded eyes, I could see Ludwig's face go red again. He gave a slight cough, "W-W-Well...if that is what you really want."

     "It is."

     We were soon settled down in our bed, facing each other. That didn't last for long as Ludwig began tossing a turning out of what I assumed were nerves (though that may have been just my own nerves getting to me). After 15 minutes of Ludwig's fidgeting, I had had enough and wrapped my arms around his waist. At first, he tensed up at the contact, but eventually relaxed into it and wrapped his own arms around me. Despite the fluttering of my heart, it didn't take long for me to fall asleep.