Usopp X Reader 💕One Shots💕

Lie Detector

". . . Franky. You know, cause, LASERS."

Franky posed in the background from his lookout position he took over from you, hearing the answer. Everyone laughed, and no buzzer.

"Who's shittier. Me, or the marimo?" Sanji asked.

"WHY YOU-" Zoro began.

"Both of you." Usopp answered.

"WHAT?!" The two of them yelled in unison with matching angry expressions.

This time, even Usopp laughed with everyone else. He wasn't finding this quite as bad as he thought it was cut out to be.

"How many do you have in your army!" You asked, knowing the answer.

"8000 MEN FOLLOW ME-" He began. The buzzer interrupted him before he finished, like it knew this bullshit by the tiny electronic heart it had.

This went on for tens of minutes at a time. This was far funnier than it was expected to be. And the surprising part was, Usopp hadn't lied once during the entire time frame. It was all just jokes. The only thing he did pull, was being sarcastic about an answer to set off the loud screeching noise to piss off a few people or scare them shitless, causing more laughs to go around.

"How many times has Sanji bled out his nose in the last three days?" You asked. "He won't tell!"

Sanji stiffened. "Well.... I did catch him this one time...." Usopp started deviously.

"Don't..." Sanji said with a small voice, extending an arm as if he was reaching for some godly help.

"Twelve. Including the rampage he took across the ship when we passed an enemy's ship and there was a lovely helmswoman driving it as we returned their fire." He explained.

"NOOOOO." Sanji collapsed, feeling like he just lost a war. Wouldn't have needed any lie detector to determine if that was a lie or not. Everyone pissed themselves laughing.

"Oo! Oo! I got one!" Nami piped up. "Do you like anyone?"

That took a screeching turn for the worse. Usopp didn't see that one coming too soon. There was no way he was going to answer this one. This was the exact question he feared would be asked. Especially at a moment as to where he is so vulnerable, and his answers can't be changed. Nevertheless, he tried.

"Psh, no." He answered as casually as possible.

The red light lit up and a little buzzing sound was emitted from the device. Nami smirked.

"First lie of the day." She said with a cunning smile.

Usopp sweat dropped and sunk down a bit.

"Who is it~?" asked Robin.

"This lie detector is broken. It's no one." He insisted.

Another buzz.

"First things first, are you into girls or guys?" Chopper asked.

"GIRLS! JESUS!" Usopp yelled, rather offended at the question.

"So, we have three choices then. Nami, Robin, or _______." Zoro said with a smirk.

Usopp gulped, settling back down.

"Is it me?' Nami asked.

Usopp swallowed hard and shook his head no.

No buzzer.

"Is it me then?" Robin asked next.

You tensed up at the situation yourself. It was between you and Robin, and with her beauty, you were sure she had the fairest chance of all. Usopp hesitated, and seemed to be shaking slightly out of anxiety. His heart was picking up intensity and was about to seemingly explode from his chest.