Love Me | Series Book #1

NINE

        I was dressed from head to toe like I was supposed to be: My long hair in an updo adorned with sequined pins, heavy masses of jewelry crawling around my neck and hanging from my ears, a mask of glimmering tones to hide - to enhance - my eyes. My lips were the main culprit, plush red. His favorite distraction when he wasn't focused on the main course. These were simply accessories to the best part.

He beat me without touching me. This time, using words as his weapon. I was a slut, a worthless bitch unworthy of his love. The dent that appeared on the windshield on the way here was somehow fault of course. For forsaking him. For trying to replace him. He hated my beauty yet consumed himself with my appearance. He held me on display now as a rare prize that only belonged to him.

I steadied the fork in my hands as his careless words echoed in my mind.

I was all he wanted. All he needed. We had entangled ourselves in my kitchen. My mother couldn't have been happier, when she saw us make up. He wanted to take me somewhere special, he said. To make it up to me. He was so sorry. So sorry. And, I had told him I loved him so I said yes. I washed the dirt off my body, ridding evidence from the earlier hours of the day I'd spent with Chase. Then I put on my best. I tore through my closet for the dress. The black one with the laced sleeves. I searched for the match to the high pumps. The ones that gave me model legs, giving the illusion that I was even taller than my five feet and six four inches. It was enough time for him to go and return to me. I met him in the car, happy, so happy that last nights horrors were behind us.

But when we pulled up to the restaurant, it was clear that he wasn't happy, and he hadn't forgotten. He'd seen him with me, and if I really loved him.. I wasn't a slut I'd spend less time with him. So he said.

"You're not going to eat?"

I studied the red tie wrapped around his neck, afraid to life my gaze to answer the question. Afraid of the derogatory term I'd become next.

"I'm not hungry."

His metal utensil clashed against the China. It was the loudest sound in the restaurant, seeming to reverberate off the omnipresent modern windows. He pressed his middle finger and thumb to his temples as his nostrils flared.

"You do this on purpose don't you?"

He did the most unpredictable thing next and chuckled as a snarl in the form of a smile covered his face.

"Get up," he demanded before I had a chance to answer his previous question. I rose to my feet on command.

"But the check-" I tried to reason.

"I'm not paying for any shit you intend to waste. Let's go."

My feet followed him into the night's cool air, and I had to resist the urge to look back. By the time we reached the parking lot it was too late for anyone who intended on stopping us. I kept my head focused downward as pulled the door to my side open, forcing my eyes to look away from the web-like dent glaring back at me.

I wasn't shocked in the least that he didn't enter on his side but on mine as the door beside me was yanked open. The next thing I expected was a fist, but the blow didn't come.

"Tell me what to do with you."

His words jostled more of a reaction out of me than any hit could have. I made myself look up at him, into his glowing, powerful gaze. The same gaze that less than to hours ago was flooded with tears at the thought of me saying goodbye.

"I don't know," I admitted, preparing for his next action.

"Well then tell me this," he leaned over me, "What do you think I should with you? I tell you time and time again," the chuckle was back. "Yet still you insist on hurting me. I can never give enough without you craving more. No matter what I do. Nothing's ever good enough for you."