You and Bucky had gotten to the to your destination safely. "You can rest, I'll keep watch. I swear, I'm gonna keep you safe" says Bucky.
"It doesn't even matter anymore. I'm gonna take a shower, alright?" you say to him. You dont even wait for an answer. You just go.
You stood in front of the bathroom sink. You wiped the foggy mirror with your hand. You stared at your self in the mirror, reflecting on all that just happened today. You felt sick to your stomach. You didn't even feel like yourself anymore. Who was this person staring back at you in this mirror? You fought the urge to punch your reflection. You were so mad at yourself. You finally walk out of the bathroom.
It felt weird not being in your apartment. The so called safe place was a small apartment. This was the same apartment you woke up in that very day the women you killed attacked you. You walk in to the small bedroom. Bucky was sitting in the chair in the corner of the room. You sat on the bed.
"Steve should be here soon" he says.
"Uh huh" you reply.
"I'm so sorry about your family Y/N" says Bucky.
"Please, stop! I don't want to talk about it, I dont want to think about it! Ok" you snap at him. There's a soft knock at the door. You knew it was Steve.
Bucky goes to answer it and enters the bedroom with Steve. "Y/N, I'm so sorry about you family" says Steve. He pulls you in for a heartfelt hug but you push back. "You said the shield agents would protect them. You said they would be safe Steve" you cry, pushing him away from you. He was taken aback. Bucky grabs you and holds you tight. "No! let go of me" you say to Bucky. You push him away. "I can't be here any more, I have to go" you say wiping your tears always. You walk out of the room and toward the front door. You reach for the door knob but Bucky grabs your wrist before you do. "You cant go out there" he says, gently pulling you away from the doosay "I know what your going through, and how it feels to be alone. To feel like you have no one" says Bucky. He wipes the tears from your eyes. "I just can't be here right now, I want to be alone" you say.
"You cant go out there it's too dangerous right now" says Bucky. You pull your wrist away from his hold. You run your fingers through your hair. "I know you think I can't handle myself but I can" you say to him. Steve just stands there not knowing what to do. "I know you can, I trained you" he said with a smirk. You had to smile at that. "I'll be back in a minute" you say. You grabbed your sweater and was out the door before he could protest.
When you got outside you pulled your hood up and started to walk. Your mind drifting away thinking about all the good times you had with your family. Then you realize that's all you'll ever have is memories. You felt miserable. "Its all my fault" you say to yourself. You couldn't help but feel extremely angry at yourself.
You walked for hours. You had been lost in your thought, you looked up and realized you had gotten lost. "Shit" you say to yourself. It was starting to get late and you didn't have a phone on you. You calmed yourself and decided that you gonna going to try to backtrack and find your way back to your temporary home. A man dressed in all black was walking towards you. He gave you a bad feeling so you decided to cross the street to avoid him. After a few blocks things started to look familiar. You felt at ease cause you knew where to go from here. As you walked you could feel some one walking behind you. Without looking back, you pick up the pace and start practically speed walking. So did the person following you. You told yourself to keep your cool. While training, Bucky said don't freak out when your in situations like this, stay calm and your thoughts will be clear and you can act accordingly. You stop abruptly and swing around. "What? Are you gonna rob me or something you asshole" you yell at him. He seemed startled by your actions at first. It was the same man you tired to avoid. He composed his self and pulled out a knife. "Go on go down the alley" he say, and you do. When in the dark alley, something inside you snapped and you let all the anger out on him. You unarmed him quickly and stabbed him in the shoulder with his own knife. With your hand still on the hilt, you twisted the knife in his wound. He screamed in pain. You pull it out and kick his knee on an angle, and broke it. Just like Bucky taught you. The man tries to stand up but falls "please" he says his voice faint.
"Please?" You say, a menacing tone your voice. You kick the man in the face.
"I'm sorry" said the man, spitting out blood.
"You better be. "You shouldnt prey on innocent women, sometimes they're not that innocent" you say to the man as you walk away and leave him lying in the dark alley.
