Start Again

Step 9

<A/N> This is just a reminder that I am not following strictly the M.C.U canon but I am also pulling inspiration from the comics that I have spent hours reading and hundreds of dollars collecting. I am in no way an expert but I have receipts so please remember we are in a land of make-believe.

***TRIGGER WARNING***There is behavior in this chapter that I would consider emotional abuse so please read with care.

The song "Dizzy On the Comedown" by Turnover was on repeat while I was writing this chapter (if you care). The seggsy song though for this chapter is "I Feel Like I'm Drowning" by Two Feet

Bucky woke up with your hair splayed across his arm. The trendils tickled against his skin and he reveled in the feeling. He slipped quietly from the best trying his best not to disturb your sleep.  You were so beautiful when you slept, it was absolutely perfect and he couldn't bear the thought that he may be the reason the sight of you like this didn't exist in the world. He took his time moving from the mattress and pausing every time you began to stir, careful as his weight moving away caused you to move. You didn't even know how hard you were pulling on the strings on his heart with every twitch and sigh.

It took him everything to get up and leave you, he wanted nothing more than to lay there and hold you all day. Work was calling and he knew better by now that he needed to be on his best behavior, he couldn't slip up. It had taken a lot for Pepper to negotiate the custody of Bucky be handled by Stark Industries, and the opportunity wasn't lost on him. He was to check in at his desk and virtually meet with his handler, that was the protocol for Mondays when he wasn't out on missions. He was being seen by a branch of FBU out of D.C. they had higher clearance and more powerful weapons which made them more equipped to handle a genetically modified half metal previously brainwashed Hydra assassin.  After last week's excitement, he knew that his leash was bound to get tighter.

When Bucky fell back into the hands of the US government it had been a bit of a tricky situation, they hadn't had to keep tabs on Steve, the way they did with Bucky.  That was the only other time that a Word War II Army veteran who also happened to be a super-soldier was frozen and brought back to life in the modern-day. So the VA wasn't exactly equipped to handle all that.

The FBU was a good place to keep Bucky on record, they were good at keeping quiet. Hell, most of the country didn't even know the Federal Bureau of Utilities existed. So having Bucky reporting there shouldn't have put anyone at risk. Still, the narcissistic part of him couldn't help but think that his connection to the FBU was the reason Hydra had targeted them. He checked in with Craig, poor old boring Craig. He was short with Buck's attitude and had little to no sense of humor. Still, the meeting was redundant and quick, with the same questions, the same reminders, but new orders.

Surprisingly enough there was no major update on the investigation and no one was blaming Bucky the way he was blaming himself. He decided it would be best to stick around the office, he had a mountain of paperwork to do with the massacre he and Sam had walked into the week before. Each deceased person needing a separate report with details of their findings as well as photos. He knew it was going to be a long day, and he was right. Seeing the bodies only briefly in person he was now faced with their lives, identities, and families. Matching that to pictures of their lifeless blood-soaked bodies could make the toughest stomach churn.

Having lunch at his desk and not taking much of a break since he started, it still had nearly rounded dinner time by the time he'd finished the first office of the FBU. Even though he'd have another office to do until the work was really done, he decided that he had seen enough blood and death for the day.

Walking out of the offices and back into the hill, he had let his mind go blank after the heavy material he had spent all day on, he really couldn't think about it anymore. It was too much even for him. Other than a few stragglers here and there the hill was practically empty. Stark Industries had a pretty strict rule about leaving on time, Pepper didn't want her employees working late into the night she valued family time, and her employees needed to do too. The life-saving work though sometimes was not able to be put off, so there were often a few night owls.